In retrospect, I guess what happened back then would be considered rape, and in a very real sense it was…certainly statutory..and it started out very terrifyingly. He was much older than I was, 11…and I remember he had gray hair, though youth distorts age somewhat. No one is as old as they seem when you’re 11.
Gary was our neighbor, and to my siblings and I, was a very nice guy. He was the one who, when my father wasn’t home, would come out into the yard and play catch with me. He knew and loved the game of baseball like I did and he had a baseball card collection that was out of this world, which is how the whole thing really started.
We were playing catch one hot July day when I was 11, just he and I. My brother was off doing older brother things and my sister was at her friend’s up the street, so I was glad for his company. After about twenty minutes, we were hot and sweaty and he told me he had a glove signed by Mickey Mantle, and did I want to see it? Did I? Absolutely! So we went to his place, he gave me a Coke (there were absolutely no drugs involved, he didn’t do anything like slip me a sleeping pill or anything like that) and we went back to his bedroom. He took the glove down from the top shelf of his closet and showed it to me, let me hold it and try it on (gently) then he let me put it back by lifting me up by the waist and resting my but on his shoulder.
As I stretched to put the glove away, that’s when his hand crept up my leg for the first time, settled on the crotch of my shorts and rubbed for just a moment. At first, I thought it might be an accident, but then his he moved his hand and slid it up my leg under the shorts, moved my underwear aside and made direct contact with my cock. I had a reasonably early understanding of sex…that is, after all, what older brothers are for…to tell you the lies, half truths and sometimes truths of sex…and I knew what he was doing couldn’t be right, so I asked him to stop. But he didn’t. In fact, his hand slid deeper and gripped my limp cock and massaged it and squeezed it. At this point there was nothing pleasurable about it…it hurt, and I asked him again to stop.
Instead of stopping, he swept me off his shoulder, took two steps back and threw me on the bed. As small as I was, it wasn’t that hard for him to sit on my chest, pin my arms down and bind my wrists with some ropes he had already tied to his bedposts. Did he have this planned? You tell me. Those ropes were awfully convenient. Once he had my arms tied, he stood up and got a pair of scissors from his nightstand, then proceeded to cut my t-shirt off of me gently, though the sight of the scissors didn’t exactly make me comfortable. After that, even though I kicked at him, it was little trouble for him to pull my shorts off of me, leaving me naked. I remember how heavily he was breathing and how scared I was…was he going to kill me? I had no idea. Without saying a word, he took his clothes off very quickly, puffing like a steam engine and just…staring at me…the entire time. When he was naked, he stood there for a moment like he was encouraging me to look at him. He had hair all over him and his cock was, to me, huge. He smiled at me, then put all his weight on my legs and crawled up my body. He kissed me on the lips and I think that’s when I really started to cry, but he kept going, making shh noises as he kissed his way down my neck, hairless chest and stomach until he got to my groin. He worked my cock with his tongue a little and took both balls in his mouth at once…though, still terrified, I was no where close to being excited. He lifted my legs up and slid his tongue into my asshole, drilling it in pretty deep. Later, this would feel good. Then, it did not.
Finally, he was ready, even if I was not, and he took my cock in his mouth. I remember he really went after it very hard and aggressively. It hurt quite a bit at first, and I was begging him to stop…it lasted a long time, several minutes and he got very frustrated that I wasn’t hard at all…his hands were working my ass pretty hard, squeezing and pulling and tugging. I was crying and begging him to stop, but he wasn’t going to, not then. Then it happened. His finger slid into my ass and moved around inside me…and I was hard in seconds. He pumped his mouth over me even harder (the friction would cause it to bleed and hurt for 3 days) but finally…finally…I felt it…and it was the most pleasurable orgasm I’d ever had..I was masturbating frequently by then. It started from the depth of my ass and built up, a tickling sensation that felt amazingly good. It seemed like every muscle in my body locked up and I yelled out as my hips drove up towards his mouth involuntarily. Like I said…it was rape…but it felt so good, like no other orgasm I’d ever had before or have had since. It seemed to go on forever, but not long enough. He fell off me and stared while I laid there, cock tingling, sore. He smiled.