The Shy Lonely Man

My name is Gareth and I am 35 years old. I’m 6’1”, weigh 185lbs, I have very short black hair and I short beard. I have just bought and moved into my first home on my own. Unfortunately I am now living on my own as my parents have both now passed away and my older sister lives with her boyfriend. I lived with parents until they passed away. I know what a sad loser living with his parents in his thirties but the reason isn’t because I’m a lazy good for nothing, I have a good job and earn decent money, the reason is that I am not very confident and I am painfully shy meaning that unlike most people my age I am a very lonely person with few friends outside of work and unfortunately I have never had a girlfriend owing to my crippling shyness. This has made me a very sad person, I put on a front around people hoping they don’t notice how sad and lonely I am. For years I used to just say that meeting someone was something I just wasn’t interested in, quite the opposite was the reality. Ever since I was 15 years old all I ever really wanted in life was to meet someone, fall in love, get married and have a family of my own. But the reality was, is that I am so shy around women that I have ended up all alone and without hope that I’ll have any of that.

I chose to move to a new town hoping to start a fresh, that maybe a new place not knowing anyone would change me and force me to come out of my shell and meet people and who knows even end up with a friend or two.

When I moved into my new apartment I didn’t see anyone for a couple of days but seeing how it was the middle of summer I assumed people were just away on holiday. Then one morning I was just leaving my apartment to go to work and someone was leaving the apartment across the landing.

“Hi” a voice said behind me as I was locking my door, I turned around to see who was talking and there stood in front of me was this beautiful woman. She was very small barely over 5′, she was what I think is described as thick, not fat at all, she had pale skin and long brown hair which had a slight curl to it.

“Oh hello” I managed to get out hoping that she hadn’t noticed that was gobsmacked that this beautiful woman lived right opposite me

“So your’e the new owner then, I’m Lucy nice to meet you” she said cheerfully and reached out her right hand to shake mine.

“Nice to meet you Lucy, I’m Gareth” I said my stomach in knots due to my shyness, I was hoping like hell it wasn’t showing on the outside.

“Sorry we haven’t introduced ourselves before now but we’ve been away” she said apologetically.

“That’s OK, I’ve been so busy sorting everything out I haven’t really been out the place for a couple of days” I said trying desperately not to fumble my words. Just then it dawned on me she said “we”. “Damn” I thought “typical I have to live right next to the most beautiful woman and she’s seeing someone”.

“Are you off to work?” she asks me

“Yeah, going a little early today just to make sure I don’t get lost, new route and all” I said

“Good thinking” she said with a chuckle “I’ll walk out with you if that’s alright, I’m off to work too”

“Sure” I said thinking how nice she was being

“So do you work here in New Borough?” she asks

“No, I work in Oldbourne, its only half and hour away so it’s not far” I said

“Is that where your from?” she asks

“No I used to live in Northport with my family, do you work here?” I ask trying to keep the conversation going.

“Yeah I work at the high school as a administrator”

“Oh ok, what does your husband do” I ask hoping above all she might say “I’m not married I live with my sister” or something that may give me some hope

“He’s a builder” she says with a bit of a sigh

I noticed this and thought “oh dear there seems to be something wrong here better not bring him up again”

“My sisters fella is a builder too” I say. Just then we get to our cars, because we are neighbours our cars are parked together in our allocated spaces. “It was nice to meet you Lucy, if there’s anything I can do for you just give me a knock” I said trying my best to be neighbourly

“It was nice to meet you too Gareth, thanks for that and the same goes for you too, just knock” she said cheering up a little.

I got into my car and waved as she drove away. I hadn’t noticed but I had been sweating like a tap because of my shyness. “Oh great” I thought “I bet she noticed too”, now I was mad at myself, “what’s wrong with me” I said aloud angry at myself “for christ’s sake you were only being friendly not trying to chat her up or anything pull yourself together”

So I went off to work admonishing myself for acting like a complete idiot in front of her. I spent the day being really pissed at myself for getting myself in the state I did. “This is someone your going to have to get used being around, your neighbours for heaven’s sake” I kept telling myself.

That evening after I had eaten I was sat watching the TV and around 8 o’clock there was knock at the door, I must admit it made me jump as I wasn’t expected anyone as you have to buzzed into the building. I went and answered the door and it was Lucy and her husband.

“Hello” I said

“Hi Gareth” Lucy said with lovely smile “This is Jamie my husband”

“Nice to meet you Jamie” I said putting my hand out, the look on his face was that of I would rather be anywhere or doing anything else than being here. He took my hand and in typical builder fashion tried to give my hand a good crushing at the same time, I tried my best not to let him crush my hand by squeezing back firmly.

“Yeah you too” he said completely disinterested

I looked at Lucy who had a look of complete embarrassment at the way his was behaving and I felt sorry for her.

“Would you like to come in?” I asked and stepped aside gesturing for them to come in. I heard Jamie sigh at this. I think he was hoping for a hand shake and then leaving.

“Thanks Gareth” Lucy said and stepped in with Jamie reluctantly following. I closed the door behind them and said “make yourself at home, can I get you a drink?”

“Oh here this is for you” Lucy said handing my a bottle of white wine “Congratulations on your new home” she said and gave me quick hug. I was so surprised at the hug I stood there like an idiot until Jamie spoke gruffly “I’ll take a beer if you have one”

“Sure no problem and for you Lucy, maybe a glass of this wine?” I asked

“Oh don’t open it just for me” she said “I’ll have whatever you guys are having”

“No its fine I was going to have some wine anyway I prefer it to beer” I said

“Hey what kind of a guy prefers wine to beer” Jamie said mockingly

My confidence was now completely shattered with that one remark, I thought I was doing so well and then wham one withering statement and it gets popped like a balloon

“Jamie shut up, don’t talk to him like that” Lucy said angrily

“Its fine” I said meekly looking at the floor

“See just a joke” Jamie said and slapped my back quite hard and then went and sat down on the sofa.

I looked up at Lucy and she gave me a apologetic smile and gently placed a hand on my arm, I meekly smiled back and turned to go to the kitchen to sort the drinks out.

I returned with the drinks and sat down it what can only be described as a frosty atmosphere it was clear words had been had. Telling myself “Come on try and hold a conversation”

“So Jamie Lucy tells me you’re a builder, my sisters fella’s a builder” I said trying to start a conversation

“Yeah” was all he said

“So what is it you do Gareth” Lucy asked trying to start the conversation

“Well I draw buildings for a surveying company” I said “You know floor plans at such”

“Oh cool, that sounds interesting” Lucy said genuinely. I couldn’t help but feel that Lucy was such a nice, genuine person, quite the opposite of Jamie, he just seemed down right rude and he’s the sort of person I bet was a bully at school.

“Yeah I’ve got to draw some pretty famous buildings over the years like cathedrals” I said starting to feel a little easier. I couldn’t help but feel that if it was just Lucy there I would have felt very much at ease. She seemed to make it so easy to talk to her, which is very unlike me especially given what happened earlier today.

“Really! I’d love to see some of your work sometime” she said

“Sure I’ll fetch some home sometime” I said feeling quite amazed that she would be remotely interested in what I did, after all nobody else ever has.

“So do your family still live in Northport” she asks

“Only my sister, my parents passed away last year” I said quietly

“Oh I’m sorry” Lucy said

“Its ok you didn’t know” I said with a little smile

“So what made you move here then” she asked

“After we sold my parents home I decided I wanted to start a fresh somewhere new away from the memories you know”

“I see, good on you that’s quite a brave thing to do” Lucy said and to which Jamie scoffed at a little. I think their views on bravery differed somewhat.

“Thanks, it’s been somewhat of a life changing few months, moving to a new town and buying my first home and living on my own for the first time” I said

“You still lived with your parents?” Jamie asked with a condensing laugh

“Jamie!” Lucy said angrily

“What?” Jamie fired back at her

“No its fine, yeah I did” I said feeling embarrassed

“How old are you?” he asked chuckling

“I was 35 when they died” I replied looking at the floor

“Wow” was all he said

“I’m so sorry Gareth” Lucy said “Come on Jamie lets go I don’t think Gareth needs anymore of your bullshit”

“Oh for christ’s sake if he can’t take a bit of ribbing about it” but before he could finish she shoved him towards the door and out into the hall.

“I’m so sorry” Lucy said and closed the door

I just sat there embarrassed not only about his behaviour which was just downright rude but he was right about me it isn’t normal for someone that age to still be at home.

I cleaned up the glasses and decided to have an early night just to end the day hoping tomorrow would be better. But on the way to the kitchen which is right by the front door I could hear shouting as I got nearer the door I could hear it was Lucy and Jamie having a really big argument, I just hope I wasn’t the cause.

After this I never saw Jamie again I just heard him whenever him and Lucy were having an argument. Lucy and I kept meeting in the hallway on the way to work as we left at nearly the same time everyday. Surprisingly I felt at ease the more I talked to her and we really became good friends I learned she was 33 years old and liked to workout which I did in the mornings before work a few time a week.

Whenever Jamie went out with his mates Lucy would knock on my door and we would spend the evening talking or watching a movie and generally having a good time. As time went on I became more and more fond of Lucy to the point I thought I was falling for her, which is absolutely ridiculous. For one I am so hopeless around women I would never be able to try anything, but more importantly she was married even if it was to a complete asshole.

During those evening we spent together talking I got the impression all was not well with her marriage she would tell me all sorts of things nothing to personal but things about how much he was out drinking or how much they were arguing. I felt really sorry for her, she was arguably my best friend at this point and I didn’t like seeing her so low.

About 8 months after I moved in, Lucy came round one evening which had become more and more frequent lately and she looked like she’d been crying.

“Hey” she said as I opened the door

I took one look at her and I knew something bad had happened.

“Hey what’s happened?” I asked concerned and gesturing for her to come in

She walked in and no sooner had I closed the door she rushed over to me and grabbed me and hugged me tight and started crying. I was taken aback at first and then realised what was happening and wrapped my arms around her and just held her let her cry.

After she stopped crying and was just sniffling I put my hands on her shoulder and pushed away ever so slightly and said “Come on let’s sit and talk about it” and turned her and walked her over to the sofa.

We sat down next to each other and I turned to face her “Now what’s happened?”

Lucy had got control of herself again and said “It’s that asshole”

“Oh dear what’s he done now?” I asked

She wouldn’t look up she was just staring at the floor as if trying to find the words.

“He left” was all she said

“What? Has he left you?” I asked now really concerned, I’d seen family members marriages end and it’s never pretty

“Yeah” Lucy sighed and started to sob

“Oh Jesus” I said quietly and put my arm around her again and pulled her to me so her head was on my shoulder. I gently put my head on hers and just held her.

After a couple of minutes she stopped sobbing and lifted her head.

“Hey it’s going to be ok” I said trying to reassure her not really knowing what to say to someone whose marriage has ended

“No its not, I haven’t told you why” she said

“What happened?” I asked now I was worried what he’d done

“Well when we got married we were very young he was 19 and I was 18 and he said he didn’t want kids which at the time I was ok with but I thought as we got older he might change his mind”

“Is that what this is about, did you ask him again?” I asked

“No I didn’t”

“So what’s happened?” I asked really confused

Lucy took a deep breath and then said “I’m pregnant”

I sat there completely dumbfounded. After a minute or so I asked “Is that why he left, because your pregnant?”

Lucy just nodded and started to tear up.

I was getting really mad now, I was madder than I think I’ve ever been in my life. My best friend had just got the news that most couples would be so happy to hear and her husband just up and left.

“Lucy, what did he say or do when you told him?” I asked almost scared to hear the answer

“He yelled at me, saying it was all my fault, that I knew he didn’t want kids and should have been more careful. Then he said I had to get rid of it”

“WHAT!!” I almost yelled, now I really was getting so mad I couldn’t control it

“He said I either got rid of the baby or he would leave” she said starting to sob again

“That no good son of a bitch” I was so pissed now

“I said I can’t have an abortion” she sobbed “then he slapped me and said then I’m going and I want nothing to do with it or you and stormed out”

The moment I heard he slapped me I started to shake with anger. I had never felt like this before in my life I wanted to find him and beat the living crap out of him.

“Where is he now?” I said through gritted teeth and stood up

“Why?” she asked looking up at me through tears

“Where is he Lucy?” I asked again

“Gareth please I don’t want you to find him, he’s not worth you getting in trouble”

“Lucy not only has he walked away from you and his responsibilities but he did the one thing no man should ever do and that’s hit you, now where is he I want to remind him how a man should behave”

“No Gareth please” she begged “I need you I don’t know what I’m going to do now, I can’t afford the apartment on my own and especially with a baby on the way I can’t afford any the stuff on my own” she started to cry again

Realising she was right I needed to be there for her more now than ever. I sat by her again and pulled her into me and held her again and started to think about what I could do to help her. During our evenings together I learned that she only had one sister and she lived three hours away other than that she had no family she could turn to, her parents and her hadn’t spoke since she got married, they were against it and seeing what a prick Jamie was I could see their point. But apparently things were said at the time that meant there was no chance of reconciliation.

After a couple of minutes it dawned on me what I needed to do. Seeing how I lived in a two bedroomed apartment and had two bathrooms, my room had en-suite and there was a main bathroom, I would have plenty of room here for her to move in and I would help her and the baby when it arrived.

“Lucy” I said pushing her away slightly so she could lift her head to look at me.

“I have an idea that will help you if you’d let me”

“What is it” she sniffled

“I want you to move in her with me, I have a spare room and you can have your own bathroom so there will be plenty of privacy for you and the baby and I will be here to help you every step of the way”

Lucy wiped the tears from her eyes and just looked at me completely shocked her mouth open slightly

“You want me to move in here, with you?” she stammered

“Yeah like I say you’d have you own room and bathroom and you won’t have to worry about paying for the apartment or the bills and all that and I want to help you with the baby” I said

“You mean it?” she asked starting to tear up again

“Yeah I sure do” I reassured her taking her hand “I’d do anything for you Lucy you’re my best friend”

“Oh Gareth thank you” she said and grabbed me round the neck and pulled me in for a huge hug and I felt her starting to cry again my shirt was already damp from the last cry now it was going to be soaked

After and few minutes she calmed down again and sat back against the sofa. “Oh look at your shirt was that me?”

“It’s fine don’t worry about it” I said

“Would you like a drink?” I asked

“A cup of tea would be nice please”

After we had our drinks I said she should go and grab some clothes and what she would need for a couple of days and then we’d move her stuff over at the weekend when we’d have more time.

That night just as we were going to turn in for the night, she turned to me and said “Thank you so much for being there for me” and she stood on her toes and gave me a kiss on the cheek and then turned and went to her room. I just stood there with my fingers touching were she had kissed my cheek. I felt really good that I was there for her and I was determined I was going to do whatever it took to be there for her.

That weekend we moved everything she wanted out of her place and managed to find room for it at mine, anything we didn’t have room for in my apartment we stored in my storage space in the basement. Anything left she just sent Jamie a text saying he could have it and that she wanted to put the apartment up for sale. The next day she got a very short message saying fine, sell it just give me my half and that was it. I couldn’t believe that after being married for 15 years that’s all he would say.

A couple on months later their apartment sold and they split the money once the mortgage was settled which didn’t leave a huge amount as what he hadn’t told her was he changed the mortgage to a interest only repayment which meant they hadn’t paid that much off so she only came away with about 4000. She was devastated when she found out she was really hoping to get more so it would be a chance to start again for her and her baby.

Over the months after she moved in we grew closer and closer and I was falling in love with her more and more with each passing day. However being the coward that I am I never said a word.

In the eight month of her pregnancy her sister came to visit her for the day. Her sister was a really nice person called Laura. In appearance she was the opposite of Lucy, she was tall and really thin.

Late in the afternoon after we’d be out for lunch and we were just chatting in the living room Lucy said she was tired and was going for a quick nap. After she waddled off to her room, me watching her the whole way, I turned to face Laura and continue the conversation and she was just looking at me with a slight knowing smile.

“What?” I asked wondering why on earth she was looking at me like that

“Oh come on” she said with a chuckle

“What?” I asked again

“I can see it you know” she said

“See what?” I asked pretending like I didn’t know what she was talking about hoping to hell she didn’t know

“Oh come off it Gareth, you love her don’t you?” she asked

I was completely frozen, was it that obvious, I hoped Lucy hadn’t noticed it, it would ruin everything if she found out.

“I….I…..I don’t know what your talking about” I said in desperation

“Gareth I’m many things but I’m not blind, have you told her?”

“No” I said very quietly, now feeling ashamed that I’d been found out, I thought I was hiding it well

“What!! why not?” Laura said surprised

“Listen Laura there’s things you and Lucy don’t know about me that mean me saying anything is out of the question”

“Oh come on what can be that bad that you can’t tell the woman you love how you feel”

“Please Laura I feel crap enough about it don’t make say it”

“Come on Gareth what is it”

“Laura I can’t please”

“Gareth you live in the same apartment for heaven’s sake you’re going to be raising a child with her, what can be so bad that you can’t tell her how you feel”

I was feeling so pathetic now I just wanted to disappear. I couldn’t look at her I just kept staring at the floor.

“Gareth please tell me, maybe I can help” Laura said softly

“I can’t tell her how I feel because I don’t know how too” I said quietly not looking up “You see I’ve never had a girlfriend before, I’ve never even kissed a girl or asked anyone out, I’ve been so shy all my life and now it’s too late, no woman wants a 36 year old who’s never had any experience before. How the hell could ever make her happy when I don’t know how to do any of it, not just the physical stuff, the emotional stuff too, I just don’t want to hurt her and make her unhappy, the thought of doing that is just unbearable” Once I finished talking I just broke down and started sobbing like a child. Now I felt even more pathetic for sobbing in front of Laura who I’d only met like 7 hours ago.

Laura got up and sat down next to me and put a hand on my back and rubbed it gently as I got control of myself.

“I’m sorry” I said “I shouldn’t behave like this”

“No I’m sorry I shouldn’t have pushed you” Laura said

“It’s ok its my fault really I shouldn’t have let it get this far, I don’t know what I was thinking” I said

“Gareth let me ask you one question”

I just nodded

“How do you feel about Lucy?” she asked

“I love her with all my heart, she’s the reason I get up every day, I love spending every second I can with her. When I’m not with her I’m thinking of her. She makes me so happy, when I’m with her it’s like nothing else matters, she makes me laugh, she makes me feel like I’m someone”

What I hadn’t realised was that because I had my head down the whole time and Lucy’s bedroom door was behind me she had come back into the room and was stood behind the sofa. Me and Laura had our backs to her so didn’t know she had come back into the room.

“You love me?” said Lucy

My head spun round so fast and I just looked at her in shock.

“I’m going to go for walk…” Laura said and got up and walked out, the whole time me and Lucy never took our eyes of each other.

When the door shut Lucy said “You love me and weren’t going to tell me?” she said with a angry tone

“Oh shit” I thought to myself “It’s now or never Gareth say something you idiot”

“I’m sorry Lucy I just couldn’t find it in myself to tell you, I don’t want to lose you” I pleaded

“What?”

“Lucy there’s things you don’t know about me”

“No there isn’t I heard you tell Laura”

“You heard?” I asked, now feeling so pathetic it was unreal I’d never felt this low in my life

“Yeah and you think that was a good enough reason not to tell me?” Lucy asked now starting to get mad at me

I was slightly taken aback by her tone

“Of course it is” I said

“You have got to be kidding me, you think because you haven’t had a girlfriend or kissed someone I wouldn’t want to be with you, is that how little you think of me?” she demanded, she was getting really angry at me now, I’ve never seen her this angry since Jamie was around.

“Please Lucy, I just don’t want to hurt you, you deserve so much better than me”

“For fucks sake Gareth what the hell is wrong with you?” she yelled at me

“Why are you so mad?” I asked terrified of her, she was livid

“WHY? WHY?” she yelled “BECAUSE I LOVE YOU TOO, YOU STUPID….” she screamed at me and fell to her knees and started to cry hard

As she fell to her knees I rushed round the sofa and grabbed her she pushed me back and started to hit me on my chest and face, I pushed my way through her arms swinging at me and wrapped my arms around her and pulled her tight to me and we both cried holding each other my face hurting where she caught me with a few good right and left hooks.

What felt like hours later, which in fact was only a matter of minutes she stopped crying and just held me tight with both hands holding hands full of my shirt. I gently pushed her away from me and looked into eyes.

“Did you just say what I think you just said?” I asked

She was looking me dead in the eye and just nodded

“Why would you feel that way about me, I don’t… I’m not…” I couldn’t find the words I was in disbelief, just then Lucy put a finger on my lips telling me to stop

“Gareth ever since we met you have been nothing but the sweetest, kindest most generous man I have ever met, you took me into your home and have never asked for anything in return, you have supported me throughout my marriage failing, all through my pregnancy you have been there, you have taken me to my appointments, never let me do anything if you were around, Gareth you have made me feel the happiest I have felt for a very very long time, I couldn’t ask for a better man than you. I don’t care if you haven’t kissed anyone or had a girlfriend, but I’d be honoured if you’d let me be your first.”

All the time she was talking I couldn’t stop looking into her eyes, I couldn’t believe what I was hearing, my dreams were finally coming true. Without thinking I just leaned forward and gently pressed my lips to hers. In my mind it was like a new years eve fireworks display going off. After 5 seconds we parted and put our foreheads together and at the same time said “wow” and we chuckled.

I took hold of Lucy’s hands and helped her get to her feet and walked her over to the sofa and we sat down next to each other still holding hands

“Well I didn’t expect that to happen” I said with a chuckle

Lucy chuckled “I’m glad it did”

“Yeah me too, but Lucy can I ask you to do something for me”

“Sure anything what is it?”

“Please be patient with me, I’m sure I’ll screw up sometime, but if you’re patient with me I promise I’ll do everything I can to make you happy”

Lucy gently cupped my face and turned my head to face her “I promise” and she gently kissed me. I was in heaven, the girl of my dreams was with me, in love with me…good god.

We kissed for a good five minutes when I felt her tongue brush my lips, now I’ve read enough stories and seen enough movies to know what she wants, but not having a clue what to do is something else. I gently part my lips a little and I feel her tongue brush between them so I parted them a little more and then I felt her tongue push pass them and into my mouth finding my tongue. Feeling this was unbelievable, trying not to disappoint Lucy I just tried to copy what she was doing, it seemed to work because she moaned ever so slightly. We kissed like this for what seemed like hours but in reality it was about 20 minutes. We just cuddled into each other on the sofa both content and happy. About 10 minutes later Laura walked back in.

“I see you two sorted things out then” Laura said with a big smile

“Yeah, thank you Laura” I said

“Hey I didn’t do anything” she said

“No you did, if you hadn’t made me say it out loud Lucy would never have known” I said giving Lucy’s hand a squeeze

“Well actually….” Laura started to speak

“What?” I asked wondering what was going on

“I kind of knew Lucy was standing there when you said it, that’s why I was pushing you so much”

“You sneaky….” I said and got up and hugged her “Thank you” I whispered in her ear

“Thank you so much Laura” Lucy said and got up and hugged her too

“I’m glad you two finally sorted it, now I think it’s time I went home and leave you two love birds alone” Laura said and gave us both another hug and kiss on the cheek and said goodbye.

After she left me and Lucy both sat back down together on the sofa and Lucy lifted my left arm so she could lay her head on my chest and then placed my arm over her chest. Not wanting to assume anything I placed my hand on top of hers and intertwined our fingers.

“Gareth”

“Yeah?”

“I really don’t want to sleep alone tonight, could I sleep with you?” Lucy asked

“As if you’d need to ask, now I’ve got you I’m never letting go” I said and kissed the top of her head

“You know I really want to take you back to your room and make love to you all night, but I can’t at this point in the pregnancy, I’m sorry” she said

“Lucy, until and hour ago I’d never even kissed a girl in my adult life, I think I can wait just a little bit longer” I said with a laugh, knowing on the inside I was a nervous wreck about it.

“Oh Gareth you’re such a sweet man, you know there are other things I could do if you want me to” Lucy said not looking up at me

“Lucy, look at me please” I asked wanting to say what I had to her looking her straight in the eye. She slowly lifted her head and looked at me and I gave her a reassuring smile

“Lucy we have all the time in the world to do whatever we want once the baby’s here, so don’t feel like you have to do anything, for me just sitting here holding you is more than I ever hoped for and would be enough for me for the rest of my life, but I promise as soon as we can I want to make love to you for the rest of my days”

Lucy then sits up and puts her hand on the back of my neck and pulls me into another deep passionate kiss.

“Lets go to bed” she says

Needing no more encouragement I stood up and helped her to her feet and we walked hand in hand to the bedroom. Lucy walked over to the bed and turned to face me as I closed the door. I turned around and walked over to the bed and started to unbutton my shirt until Lucy grabbed my hand to stop me.

“Let me” she said

Lucy then slowly unbuttoned me shirt and then pushed it off my shoulders and onto the floor. She bit her lower lip a little as she looked at my body. She then started to unbuckle my belt and unbutton my jeans and then slowly pushed them down and I stepped out them just standing there in my boxers which is what I normally sleep in. She looked up at me and placed her hands on my chest and said “May I?”

I just nodded at this point as I was quite nervous hoping that what lay beneath my boxers would not disappoint Lucy. I’m 6.5” when hard so I’m no pornstar and I was hard because I was nearly naked with the woman I loved and who loved me.

Lucy slowly lowered her hand down my body running her hand over my bulge making me shiver at her touch.

She looked at me the whole time she was undressing me and I never took my eyes off her either wanting to take everything in.

She gently took hold of the waistband of my boxers with both hands and slowly pushed them down releasing my hard cock. I’d never seen it so hard it was pulsating with every heartbeat. She looked down at it and moaned.

She gently took hold of my hard cock making me shudder at her touch as she slowly started stroking me.

“Lucy I won’t last long” I said breathing a bit heavy she is the first person to touch me like this after all

“Its ok sweetie I know” she said pulling me down for a kiss

After we broke the kiss I asked if I may undress her, she just nodded and bit her lower lip making me smile, she looked so beautiful when she did that. Nervously I reached out my hands shaking a little I was as nervous as hell as I fumbled with the buttons on her blouse. She never said a word or moved she just let me take as long as I needed to. I undid the last button and gently pushed her blouse off her shoulders letting it fall to the floor. I took in the sight in front of me she looked stunning. Her breasts were small just how I like them, about the size of a tennis ball. Her bra was a plain black sports bra and her belly was really swollen with the baby but somehow it made her even more beautiful. I must admit to being completely lost on how to remove the sports bra and the look on my face must have said so as Lucy just chuckled and took it off and I swear my mouth may have hit the floor at the sight of her naked breasts.

Lucy just lifted my chin with one finger and gave me a cheeky smile and said “My eyes are up here you know”

I just nodded my head in a sorry you caught me staring kind of way and gave a nervous chuckle. She pulled my head down for another deep, slow passionate kiss. I was putty in her hands right now. I slowly lifted my hands onto her shoulders and rubbed my hands up and down her upper arms feeling how soft her skin felt. She took hold of my left hand and pulled away from the kiss and without taking her eyes of mine guided my hand onto her breast. She was watching my face for my reaction as I felt the first breast in my life. I was transfixed at the feel of her skin it felt so soft but her nipple was so hard. I gently squeezed her breast taking in the feeling, Lucy moaned gently as my hand grazed over her hard nipple, feeling bolder now I placed my right hand on her other breast and repeated what I was doing with my left hand. Lucy meanwhile reached down and gently took hold of my hard cock and slowly and gently started to stroke me, it felt amazing sending shivers down my spine.

Lucy said “Kiss me” breathlessly as we felt each others bodies, so I lowered my head down and kissed her trying to repeat what we did before as she seemed to really enjoy it. After several minutes of this I broke the kiss and took hold of her shoulders and gently encouraged her to lay down on the bed, once she was laying down on her back I lowered myself down over her but with my body just to the side, not wanting to put any weight on her swollen belly. I lowered my head and kissed her and she wrapped her arms around me pulling me tight to her. The feel of her naked breasts against my chest was wonderful. After we spent about ten minutes just holding each other and kissing Lucy broke the kiss and said “Lay on your back Gareth I want to do something for you”. Not wanting this to end I did as I was told. She sat up and rested on her left elbow with her head next to mine. She reached out with her right hand and took hold of my hard cock again making me moan slightly at her touch. “Do you like me touching your cock?” she whispered in my ear. “Oh god yes it feels so good” I gasped as she stroked me gently.

She whispered into my ear “Your cock feels so good in my hand”. At this point there was no way I was going to last very long not only with her stroking me but her talking to me the way she was was driving me crazy.

“Oh god Lucy! I think I’m going to cum soon” I gasped

“Cum for me Gareth cum in my hand” she whispered into my ear

“Oh god uuuugggghhhhh!!!!” I grunted as I bucked my hips cumming harder than I have ever done. Rope after rope of cum shot out of my cock onto my stomach and chest, Lucy just kept up the same rhythm stoking me as I came milking every last drop out of me.

“Wow sweetie that was so hot” she whispered in my ear as she slowly stopped stroking my cock letting it flop down onto my stomach as I softened. She then started to trace her index finger through the cum on my stomach and chest drawing patterns as she went. The sight of her doing this was so hot. She then did something that really surprised me, she scooped up some of my cum on her index finger and looked me in the eye as she put it in her mouth and sucked her finger clean. “Mmmmm you taste good” she cooed.

“Oh boy” was all I good say mesmerized at what she was doing. Unbeknownst to me the sight of her playing with my cum and then sucking her finger had gotten me going again downstairs and Lucy noticed “I see someone is rather eager”. Wondering what she was going on about I looked down to see I was hard again.

“That’s all because of you” I said with a little laugh

“Oh really then we’ll have to do something about it then won’t we” Lucy said. And before I knew what was happening she moved down so she was leaning over my cock. She took hold of it again in her right hand and then leant down and kissed the end. My eyes must have looked like they were about to fly out of my head. I couldn’t believe what was happening I was in heaven. She then licked the head tasting my cum again and let out a small moan. She then took my cock and put it all in her mouth in one motion, the feeling was indescribable as she then started to suck on my hard cock. She got into a steady rhythm as she sucked and then started to play with my balls as she sucked. I was moaning as she sucked, this felt amazing to me. After several minutes of this I could feel that was getting close.

“Lucy I’m close” I said breathlessly trying to warn her

“Mmmmm” was all I got in reply as she picked up the pace

“Oh god Lucy!!!” I moaned loudly as I bucked my hips cumming hard again, she just kept sucking my cock trying to get every last drop out of me. Eventually she slowed and stopped by kissing the head again and then turned to look at me.

“Did you enjoy that as much as I did?” she asked with a very sexy look on her face

“Oh yeah, that was unbelievable” I said still panting slightly

Lucy moved up and lay her head on my chest and held onto me. I wrapped my arms around her holding each other.

“Lucy” I said

“Yeah?”

“I want to make you feel as good as you made me feel, I just don’t know what I’m doing, will you tell me what to do?” I asked feeling ashamed that I even needed to ask this

“Of course sweetie” she replied stroking my chest with her hand.

I untangled myself from our embrace and lowered her gently on to her back. I then kissed her softly and then slowly kissed my way down her body starting at her neck, onto her shoulder, gently kissing her. I slowly moved from her shoulder kissing her chest and onto her breasts. When I reached her hard nipple I kissed them and then gently started to suck and lick her nipple. She moaned as I did this running her hands over my head and holding my head against her breast. So I stayed on her nipples for a few minutes and then started to kiss my way down her swollen belly. When I reached her panties I kissed her inner thighs and gently slipped my thumbs into the waistband of her panties, I gently pulled them down as she lifted her hips slightly. I pulled them down her legs and threw them on the floor. I looked back to see the first pussy I’d ever seen in person, it was a beautiful sight, she was shaved bald. I was just staring when Lucy said gently “Go ahead touch it”

Nervously I reached out slowly with my right hand and gently placed my fingers on her pussy, she let out a small gasp making me pull back a little “It’s ok” she said with a reassuring smile “I’ve just waited a long time for you to do that and I’m quite excited”.

I placed my hand back on her pussy and it felt hot and wet but velvety soft at the same time. Using just the first two fingers on my right hand I rubbed up and down her lips exploring the feel and texture of her pussy. “Mmmm” she moaned “Thats nice, just rub here a bit” she said and took hold of my hand and directed my fingers to a hard nodule at the top of her pussy. “Mmmm that’s it right there” she cooed

Now knowing where she wanted to me to concentrate I gently rubbed her clit making her moan and wriggle. This was music to my ears hearing her moan, knowing I was giving her pleasure made me feel so good and was giving me more confidence. I decided to be bold and moved my left hand toward her pussy, placing my index finger at her opening and pushing in an inch. Looking up to see her reaction, she had her eyes closed tight as was moaning quite loudly now. I decided to push my finger in further till it wouldn’t go any further. I had read in many stories about doing the motion for come to me with my finger and I should feel a spongy type spot and to rub that, so I decided to try it and see what happens. As I did this Lucy jerked upright and yelled “Oh shit” quite loud. “Are you OK?” I asked concerned I’d hurt her. “Oh god yes keep doing that” she gasped grabbing my wrist as I rubbed her clit. I couldn’t stop now if I wanted to she wouldn’t let go of my wrist she was grabbing me hard now and I could feel her nails digging in, although this was hurting seeing her in so much pleasure just made me want to keep going.

“Oh shit Gareth I going to cum!!” she yelled

“Cum for me Lucy” I encouraged her “Let it go”

“Aaahh shhhiiitttt” she gasped and her body went rigid and she started to buck her hips. Her thighs clamped down on my arms holding me in between her legs, I kept up the rubbing I was doing until she gasped “Stop! Please, I can’t take anymore”. So I stopped doing what I was doing slowly as she came down from her orgasm. She gradually relaxed her thighs letting me free, I leant forward and kissed my way back up her body following the path I took earlier until I reached her mouth and I placed my forehead on hers and looked her in the eyes “Lucy I love you so much” I said quietly. She wrapped her arms around my neck and said “I love you to”. I moved in and kissed her without any reservations or nerves knowing that I was with the one woman I wanted to be with for the rest of my life.