I sat in the waiting room with my mom. A familiar room, but today it felt foreign, different, strange in ways that was hard to explain. It could be that I was simply anxious about the exam. A physical was required by the school to play any sports and I really wanted to try out for the basketball team. I knew everything would be fine, but post puberty meant that there was more to this than the simple heart rate and blood pressure.
“It will be fine honey.” My mom made every attempt to ease my nerves. Her motherly voice was hollow, offering little to find comfort in. I knew she was trying her best, but behind the words, she too remembered her experience.
“I know, just not sure I want Dr. Andrews seeing me in that way.” I was comfortable with my doctor, but had never revealed much of myself to a guy before. Sure he had depressed my tongue, pressed the stethoscope against my chest, but my mom had done me the disservice of explaining the vaginal and breast exam portions. It was meant to provide fair warning, but it generated a sense of embarrassment.
“Kimi?” The nurse called out. “If you could come with me?” It was Joanna, it was her familiar voice; at least starting the appointment as usual served to relax the nerves.
“Hi.” I said as passing through the door.
“How are you doing Kimi? I hear you are trying out for the basketball team?” She led me to the scale.
“Yup, and I think I have a good chance.” I stepped up and stood straight, completely distracted from my worries. “I am one of the taller ones.”
“1.75 Meters. I would say you are tall for your age. Definitely helps when it comes to basketball. And,” Joanna paused while adjusting the weights. “60 Kilos. You could easily be a power forward.”
“You saying I’m fat?” I had to joke, of course I was one of the thicker girls out there, but never felt that I was fat.
“Not at all. Just that you’re not one of those skinny girls that cannot stand their own.” Nurse Joanna, had played high school and college ball so she knew what was needed of a female basketball player.
“Okay, let’s put you in room seven.” She walked me into the room and had me sit, quickly taking my blood pressure and my pulse. “Good, I see you have been keeping up with your exercises.”
“Everyday! Gotta be ready for tryouts.” I had finally found my comfort zone.
“Alright, go ahead and disrobe. Here is a gown you can put on.” She handed me the flimsy little piece of material.
“Um.” I unfolded it but fumbled, trying to figure the top from the bottom.
“The opening goes in front. Use the ties if you want, but the doctor will need to undo them eventually.” Nurse Joanna smiled, but she noticed the awkward look in my face. “Don’t worry, he is gentle and knows that this is your first exam. He will explain everything as he goes. Plus I will be right here during the entire exam.”
“Okay.” I really did not feel that much better about it, but figured I was here and needed to just get through it. She smiled before leaving me alone to figure out this so called gown. Once it was open and completely unfolded, it was pretty straight forward. I took off my clothes, but left my panties on. Once my arms were through the holes in the gown I wrapped it around my body and took a seat on the crumply paper lined table.
A few minutes of mind wrecking silence passed before the shocking knock at the door. “Come in?” It almost sounded like a question, uncomfortable and unsure, but one of those instinctive responses.
“Kimi? Are you decent?” It was Dr. Andrews’ voice.
“Yup.” Not really, I was virtually naked under this seemingly pointless garment.
“Good.” The doctor walked in followed by Joanna. “How are we doing today? Joanna tells me you are trying out for the basketball team. Always figured you would be good at that sport.” He checked my chart as he approached me. “Looks like you have already had your TB and Tetanus shots. Good.” He handed the folder to Joanna and pulled out his stethoscope.
“Joanna also tells me this is your first time for a breast and vaginal exam.” He spoke calmly as he listened to my heart, and my lungs.
“Mmm, hmm.”
“Well, don’t you worry. If we can, we will try to make this as enjoyable as possible.” He reached for the scope and looked into my ears and nose. “Do you have any questions before we begin?” He pressed his fingers into my throat just below my jaw, moved up along the ridge of the bone and back down.
“No, not really.” My worries began to subside. Everything seemed normal enough.
“Have you ever given yourself a breast exam?” He waited for my reply.
“Nope.” I had teased my nipples before, but nothing medical.
“Alright then, let’s walk you through this. Go ahead and lay back onto the table.” I laid down from my sitting position. “Good, now raise your left arm for me.” My robe fell open. I had not tied it. “What you want to do is rub your breast in a circular pattern from the nipple outward.”
His hand pressed firmly against my breast. In a smooth motion, he circled my nipple and spiraled out. The warmth of his hand and the foreign touch of the doctor were enticing. I felt a twinge as he massaged my soft tissue.
“Does that make sense?” He finished up near my arm pit.
“I guess so.” I liked the feel of his strength.
“Good, let’s have you do the other side. When you do this, try to feel for any abnormalities or lumps.” He watched as I used my own hand on my own breast.
Like this?” It was not the same, but I was already flushed from having his hand on me.
“Yes, just like that.” He placed his fingers around my nipple and lightly brushed against them.
“Um,” I felt the soft stimulation, but was interrupted.
“Just seeing how your body responds. Since you have entered puberty, we want to make sure that all is well, especially with responses to various stimuli.” He continued until the nipple was hard and sticking straight up into the air.
“That feels nice.” It was the truth, but something I had not meant to speak out loud.
“Good, it should.” He moved to the other side, until that nipple felt like it could cut glass. Once convinced that each one was fully erect he began to use both of his hands. This sent a shiver through my body that originated from between my legs. It was curious.
“Oh.” It felt embarrassingly good.
“Feeling alright?”
“Yes.” I stumbled on the simplicity of the word.
“Alright, let’s move on. If I could have you put your feet into the stirrups.” He gently grabbed my ankles and rested my feet into place. My gown fell completely open and my sudden awareness made me double check that I was still wearing my panties.
“Oh, still wearing your panties?”
“Yeah, sorry.”
“No problem.” He tapped my leg. “Let’s go ahead and have you lift your hips.” I complied as he hooked his fingers into the waist band and slid them over and off. The last protection against exposure had been removed. Once my feet were back in place, my entire body was open to him. My body shook with nervousness.
“Cold? Here let’s use this.” He took a blue folded sheet and placed it over my legs and draped it down to my belly. It was enough to disguise the fact that I was still spread eagle in front of the doctor and psychologically warm me up. Truth is, it did little of either.
“Thanks.”
“No problem. It can get chilly in here. I don’t know why they don’t keep it warmer. Maybe we should designate one room for these exams and keep it heated. What do you think?” He peered over the sheet and smiled.
“Yea, that might work.”
“Alright, I’m going to touch you now. Tell me what you feel.” He placed his finger on my clit.
“Whoa.” I was not sure how to respond. The contact of his finger stunned me.
“Do you know what this is called.” He rubbed it in a curious way, soft and delicate movements.
“Um,” I was completely distracted with how it felt. Little shocks jolted me.
“This is your clitoris, or clit for short. It is very sensitive and very powerful.” He moved his finger down, between my pussy lips. The next time his finger found my clit again, it was warm and moist. “From the looks of it, your clitoris is pretty much fully developed.”
“Uh huh.” It sounded clinical, but I could not maintain my composure. His stimulation was generating a feeling that was rapidly building.
“Many women can experience an orgasm by simply stimulating this one part.” I understood that. I may have been na?, but the idea of an orgasm was talked about among my friends. Sometimes, we called it a climax, cumming or the big “O”.
“Oh.” It made sense to me know. “Wait, stop.”
“Is everything okay?” Dr. Andrews failed to heed my warning.
“It feels funny. Kind of like I am going to pee.” I felt the urge deep inside of me.
“Actually, that is probably not the case. Let’s see what happens. Just relax and don’t fight it.” His fingers hastened their pace.
“Oh, okay, oh my.” The rush hit me hard as I felt my entire body strain and flex. “Ah.” I was convulsing on the table.
“Nice.” His finger released my clit, but the ghost of his touch remained, feeding the surge that took control of me.
“Wow.” I gave one last gasp and suddenly felt my muscles relax.
“That my dear is what we like to call an orgasm. Was it your first?” Was he kidding?
“Yeah, that was fantastic.” It sure was my first, and boy did it feel great.
“Good, that is the normal response. It also produced lubrication for what we are about to do next.” Really? I could not imagine what else was to come.
“Okay.” I was ready. After that, I could not fathom why I was so afraid to have this exam.
“Before we do this, I noticed that you no longer have your hymen in tact. Are you a virgin?” It sounded personal.
“Yes.” I paused trying to remember the hymen part of his question. “Oh, I did that a year ago. Not so fun, but it was from biking.” I remembered the day and the shame I felt. Blood stained my crotch for all to see.
“I understand. No need to go into details. It happens to a lot of girls.” That made me feel a bit better. Something I had not really talked to my friends about and glad I wouldn’t have to detail it to the doctor. “Just so you know, it looks like the development of your labia minora is coming along nicely as well.” What did he say?
“Okay.” Did he really think I knew what he was talking about?
“Your inner vaginal lips. Sorry. I will try to use layman terms. It looks like you are past stage three . . .. In other words, you are developing into a young woman right on schedule.” He looked at me with that familiar smile.
“Thanks.”
“Okay, next I need to do a pap smear, so I will be inserting a speculum into your vagina. You will feel some pressure, but I will try to be quick. ”
“Okay.” I was nervous again.
“Here we go.” I felt something hard easing its way into me. When it stopped, I felt the pressure. It was not pleasurable, but it did not hurt either, more uncomfortable than anything. His head disappeared from view for a moment. It was not long before the pressure eased and the object was pulled out.
“Done. Not too bad right?”
“No, not that bad.” I thought it was over and sighed. Not so much because of relief, but because I wanted to know more about these new feelings that he had brought out.
“Almost done.” The words I secretly wanted to hear. “One more test to go. This isn’t your mother’s exam anymore.” He chuckled.
All I could do was smile back at his misunderstood humor. Why did he have to mention my mother?
“We have a new tool that will do a more thorough exam of your vagina: elasticity, muscular tone, and vascular pressure. Technical jargon again. But more importantly, most patients find it quite pleasurable.
“Good. I was worried it was going to be a repeat of what just happened.”
“No, but I will say that it does go inside of you. I will slide it in and let you get accustomed to it before we begin. I will need to move it in and out in order for it to get the information it needs.” He unzipped something behind the sheet and appeared to struggle a bit to get it out.
“How long will it take?” If it felt good, I really did not care, but felt some uneasiness creep in.
“It varies, just have to keep going until it is done.”
“Will I be able to tell?” I was actually curious.
“I am sure you will. It will feel like it is swelling and then release some warm gel into you. This is to minimize any potential reactions to the tool.”
“Really? Okay, sounds interesting.”
“Ready?” He seemed anxious.
“Sure.” I tried to relax, but the anticipation was getting the better of me. Part of me was excited, part of me erred on caution and questioned his lack of more details.
“Okay.” He began rubbing the device between my vaginal lips. It was not hard like the previous device. Still solid and rigid, just not hard like plastic. It felt like he was trying to lubricate it with my own natural moisture, strangely nice sliding up and down before it found my opening and paused. I caught my breath and waited for it to enter me.
“Here we go.” At first just pressure, before prying into me, stretching me like the speculum. The shape was unique, not exactly smooth, more textured, rough, sloped at the tip; sliding in deeper to a ridge where its size suddenly decreased; not a lot, just enough to ease the pressure, but was still bigger than I had anticipated. It was driving in further, almost like it was going to end up in my belly.
“Almost there.” With a sudden movement, he pushed it to the back of my vagina. It had hit the end. Crazy, this huge tool was so far inside of me, farther than I thought anything go in.
“Are you okay?” I was fine; a little excited, teetering on the verge of pain.
“Yeah.” I bit my lip.
“Good, I will start the test.” Gradually backing out, the tool left behind my stretched walls, allowing them to slowly ease back into place. But only momentarily, as it changed direction and pressed forward once again. Back and forth. The sensation of having this thing inside of me, leaving me, penetrating me, was like nothing I had ever experienced.
“Wow, that feels nice.” This tool felt alive, like it had a life of its own. It moved, twitched, like a snake searching for its prey.
“Your vaginal muscles are strong.” He gasped. It appeared to be an effort for him to use this tool and it made me wonder why. The tool jerked, it thrust deep. “That is incredible.”
I did not know how to respond. The orgasm inside of me was building, stronger than before, slowly growing this time, not a mad dash to the finish. The calculated control I thought I had was gone. I moaned. It felt way too good moving inside. After the first, the rest followed. The sound echoed in the room. It was if I was having sex. Even the doctor was getting into it with his own grunts.
“You are amazingly tight. I think we may finish testing sooner than I had anticipated.” The tool was moving faster. “Almost there. I can feel it.” My body was being rammed by this thing, or was it the doctor; he was really putting his weight into it or something. I also felt another object, the device had an attachment, hanging from it, something that kept hitting my naked bum. It wasn’t hard, but rather kind of soft. The paper crumpled underneath me, allowing my body to slide back and forth on the vinyl surface below it.
“Okay, ready for the final test?”
“Oh, um, sure.” If it kept feeling as good as this one was, I was ready.
“Just a bit more.” The tool was beginning to swell just like he said. The movements were becoming erratic. “Uh, oh, here it comes.” He pushed the tool deep and held it still. Suddenly it erupted, releasing the warm gel. It felt more like a pulse or stream, but I felt the warmth filling me. It was enough to give me my own climax.
“Oh, my, god.” My entire body flexed, tightened, shook. Even my vagina clamped down on the tool. Dr. Andrews must have sensed it.
“Yes, you are cumming. I can feel your vaginal walls contracting. Oh so good.” His voice was rattled and his hands unstable. I could tell he was shaking too. “A few more.” The tool jerked inside of me, releasing more gel. I thought for sure it would leak out. A couple of more quick movements, and the tool began to change. It was, shrinking, getting smaller, softening.
“Did I break the tool?” Had my vagina clenched too hard?
“No, no, Kimi, that just means it is done. We were able to get the readings we wanted. You did great. How do you feel?” I could feel the tool leaving. It left an emptiness inside, but it did leave behind something I could remember it by. The warmth of the gel remained. I felt it escaping. Again, I heard the zip and knew the tool had been put away.
“Is that it?” A part of me was hoping for another test.
“Yes, that’s it.” He wiped my vaginal lips. “You can get dressed now.” The doctor cleaned up a few things, wrote in my chart and then handed it to Joanna. “All done here. She did great don’t you think?” He looked back and me and smiled.
“She did.” Joanna closed the chart. “Well Kimi, that wasn’t so bad was it?”
“No, nothing like I expected. But I am a bit embarrassed.” I had actually forgotten she was in the room. I had two orgasms right in front of her.
“It’s okay, happens to a lot of girls here. I see it all the time. Nothing to be ashamed of.”
“Oh, okay. I guess I don’t feel so bad.” I grabbed my panties and slipped them on.
“Here, you might want to use this.” She handed me a thin pad. “It will help with the leaking.”
“Thanks.” I peeled the adhesive paper and lined my panties. I was dressed in no time and ready to leave, but was unsure how to explain this to my mom. Would she understand? Did I even understand? All I knew was that it felt great.