Mellors was something of an enigma. A fine, hansom, upstanding young man with no ambition beyond becoming a Butler at my country house in Buckinghamshire.
He lived in the village all his life, he excelled at the village school and yet when time to leave school came he approached me for a position.
“But young man you can surely do better than enter service?” I enquired and when he replied with some unlikely tale I offered him a position of footman with a ridiculously low salary which he accepted with alacrity.
I suspected from the start the attraction was my daughter Lavinia, all swirling hair, girlish laugh, sparkling eyes and full of life, like her mother about whom the least said the better, suffice is to say she had had every member of my Polo team and most of the opposition before I sent her to Brighton where I believe she now works in a whore house.
I knew Mellors and Lavinia were carnally active “At it like knives,” to use the vernacular and it was a surprise she had not already fallen for a child. For this reason as she became of age I arranged for her to marry one Humphrey Raymond, a dear friend of mine, recently widowed.
Humphrey could have been the inspiration for the Humpty Dumpty fable, very near as big round as he was tall he did not wear his sixty years well, but he was like an older brother to me, the sort who puts frogs in ones boots and tells tales to Mama.
There was just the problem of Lavinia’s lost maidenhood, so I hatched a plot to resolve that issue.
“Droit de Signeur,” my father had claimed the right to any maids maidenhead ahead of her wedding, it worked well, especially for girls whose maidenheads had been well and truly lost long before the wedding. Father had the blame, whether he had the girl or not, and indeed her had Doctor Legge inspect the maiden and if the maidenhead were gone he forwent the pleasure only taking fresh young untouched maidens.
I only indulged occasionally, preferring to seek relief with a chambermaid, a fresh unplucked one every now and again, carefully plucked and then firmly ensconced in a patent chastity aid. I had indulged with Lavinia’s governess at one time and now had to provide accommodation for her and her brat at Hastings, so now I dallied with lower orders whose accommodation could be provided far more cheaply.
Lavinia was not in the least impressed with the husband I had chosen for her, “Why?” she demanded.
“He is an admirable fellow,” I suggested.
“And how much is he paying you?” she demanded.
“Nothing,” I insisted.
“Then it must be blackmail,” she surmised.
“At least when you are safely wed you shall be able to sample the servants to your hearts content with no risk of bearing bastards,” I assured her.
“Daddy, what sort of girl do you take me for?” she demanded.
I ignored her.
He wedding day approached and I summoned Dr Legge the afternoon of the day before the ceremony was due.
“Just a formality doctor, I need to ensure her virginity before the ceremony,” I advised.
“Dear god, surely you shan’t pluck your own offspring!” he blustered.
“Actually, no, on the contrary,” I confided, “I am reasonably confident she has been plucked frequently by a servant, this is why she must wed, though if by any mischance she has not then we must reconsider the matter entirely.
Lavinia was not at all amused to be commanded to appear before doctor Legge, “What is the meaning of this?” she demanded.
“The good doctor is required to verify your virginity,” I explained.
“Why?” she enquired.
“Because,” I explained, “I have the right to every maidenhead within the parishes of my estate, obviously I cannot take your maidenhead, so it must be recorded.”
“Pah,” she snapped, “Very well doctor do your worst!” she snapped and she raised her voluminous skirts to reveal her upper thighs.
“Dear god she is shaven like a whore!” the doctor exclaimed.
I was appalled “Lavinia! what is the meaning of this?”
“Mama says it is necessary to rouse elderly gentlemen,” she declared.
“Your mother, how, she has not been here for a good many years,” I insisted.
“She writes me letters sometimes,” she explained, “Mellors delivers them.”
“On the couch please my dear and spread your legs that I may examine you,” Dr Legge requested as he thrust his hand down his breeches to re arrange his manhood.
She sat down lofting her skirts, I saw her shaved belly and felt sick, how could my daughter have become such a wanton whore I pondered.
The doctor eased her thighs apart and taking his monocle he inspected her womanhood, gently easing her woman’s lips apart as I looked on.
“She is intact my lord,” he declared.
“What, how so, it cannot be!” I spluttered.
“Oh how little you think of me!” Lavinia declared, “Shall you take it yourself and go to Hades for eternity?”
“No, the very thought makes me nauseous,” I declared, “Are you sure doctor.”
“Indeed sir,” he replied.
“Then how do you explain your dalliances with Mellors?” I demanded.
She bridled, “Have you been spying on me?”
“Tis common knowledge,” I declared.
“Well he has never behaved improperly,” she explained, “Though I admit Mama did enlighten me,” she paused, “Mama explained how fingers and the tongue may satisfy a gentleman with no risk of bearing a child.”
“Dear god, and Mellors accepts this?” I asked.
“Until I’m wed, then he may have me whenever he wishes,” she simpered.
“Am I to take it you love Mellors?” I asked.
“No silly,” she sighed. “I lust for his rippling muscles and stiff manhood, I cannot love a man so much my social inferior.”
I was affronted, Mellors was an excellent chap, while Lavinia was rapidly turning into her mother. A plan unfolded. I would teach Lavinia a lesson she would never forget.
“One moment,” I ordered, “Stay exactly where you are!”
I stepped from the room and bellowed “Mellors!” at the top of my voice.
He came running, I heard him leave the kitchen, along the passage and up the stairs, to the ground floor and then along past the withdrawing and dining rooms to my study where we were assembled.
“Ah Mellors, I understand,” I started, Lavinia had lowered her skirts, “I said don’t move, raise your skirts and spread your legs again Lavinia.”
She gave me a black look but did as I said.
I continued, “Yes I understand, that you Mellors have been using my daughter like a whore?”
He stuttered, “I have never, I haven’t,” he shuffled awkwardly, “Never had carnal knowledge.”
“Not at all?” I continued, “Not with your lips on her shaven mound, your tongue in her moist slot, your cock between her firm mounds?” He blushed crimson. “Has she never suckled your cock, swallowed your seed? Have you never suckled her rampant bosom buds? Have you never rammed your rampant manhood into her tight puckered ass hole?”
“Not that no, I would never do that,” he pleaded appalled at my suggestion.
“And the rest?” I asked.
“Yes, I cannot deny it, that’s what we did and I kissed her lips last thing at night,” he said and he added nervously. “Am I dismissed?”
“Bloody hung more like,” I suggested, “But a service first.”
He seemed puzzled, “Keep your skirts lofted Lavinia, spread your legs and prepare for your maidenhead to be ripped asunder,” I ordered.
I continued, “As I cannot exercise the droit de signeur and take my own daughters maidenhead I must delegate, and in view of Dr Legge’s heart condition, it must fall to you.”
Dr Legge protested, “My heart is strong as a horse,” he insisted.
I nodded “Indeed, but you are at least fifty years of age and horses are generally dead long before that, so, Mellors, disrobe, and to your duty.”
He looked at me, at the Doctor and at Lavinia.
“Oh well it could be worse, I suppose,” Lavinia sighed.
“I cannot,” Mellors pleaded.
“Judging by the bulge in your breeches I would say you should have no difficulty what so ever,” the doctor insisted.
“Obey my order or be dismissed,” I ordered, “Good god man is this not what you have dreamed of.”
“Oh well if I must,” Mellors agreed rather eagerly.
He undressed carefully rather than the alacrity of one which could only afford to pay for ten minutes with a whore which I would have expected.
“Father!” Lavinia pleaded but she stilled her tongue when Mellors hugely engorged member sprang free.
She barely even had the moment to say “Be gentle with me,” before Mellors gently took hold of her around the waist and eased his member within her. In just one smooth moment she was his. Just the briefest moan and she was his. No resistance what so ever.
“Oh Miss Lavinia, I must apologise,” Mellors said uselessly as he took his pleasure.
She looked mildly ridiculous, dressed in her day clothes to the waist and entirely bare below.
“I say Legge, do you see these two fucking?” I asked.
“Of course I do Hansen, I’m not blind,” he agreed.
“Then will you sign to that effect, it requires two signatures and the signature of a Justice of the Peace and a professional gentleman will suffice,” I ventured.
“What for?” he asked stupidly.
“Common law marriage,” I explained. “We have seen a great demonstration of affection, indeed a fornication, so all that is required is to sign a deposition to that effect.”
“Now hold hard Hansen,” Legge blustered.
“Five guineas for your trouble?” I ventured.
“Do you have a form?” he came back. As it happened there were a sheaf of the same in my desk.
Lavinia had he head thrown back gurgling and gasping with pleasure when Mellors finally shot his wad and collapsed upon her.
“Congratulations, I now declare you to be man and wife in common law!”
“Oh very funny,” Lavinia sighed.
“Oh no, he is not joking,” Legge ventured, “We have signed the document, Mellors is now your husband.”
“And I am afraid your marriage to Humphrey Raymond cannot now proceed,” I added.
“But father!” she demanded, “What about the Church, the presents, the reception?”
“The presents can go back, the vicar will have to be paid as will the choir and bell ringers,” I explained.
“How shall I find a rich husband now?” Lavinia asked as she dabbed herself with a handkerchief.
“You shall have dowry enough to support yourself and Mellors,” I suggested, “Whom I do believe has the makings of a fine gentleman and may well excell in business with a good woman behind him, and in the absence of one you will have to suffice.”
“And the reception?” Legge enquired, “All that food and wine?!
“We shall celebrate Mr and Mrs Mellors,” I suggested.
“You idiot!” Lavinia scolded Mellors, “Now look what you’ve done!”
“Hush, we will think of something,” Mellors said quietly.
“Absolutely, now if you will excuse me I have a rampant member myself,” I said as I excused myself and went to find my latest maid.
She saw me coming, she tried to run, “No master,” she said as I caught her by the shoulders, “Don’t tear my smock, let me take it off, it takes me ages to sew back together again.”
I released her and good as her word she removed her smock to stand naked but for her silk stockings and slippers.
“Can’t you wait ‘till we get to your bedroom?” she asked, “As doing it against a door frame hurts my back.”
“So climb on my cock and I’ll carry you,” I suggested.
“Oh you are naughty!” she simpered, “Someone might see!”
“Let them, let them see I am far from being in my dotage!” I replied as she stood against the wall with her legs spread eagerly awaiting my rampant cock.
Joyously she raised herself up to accept me and then grasping her smock while wrapping her legs around me she gave herself to me as waves of ecstasy swept over her.
I strode forth to my study, she held my breeches so I did not trip over them and I strode proudly through the door.
“Father!” Lavinia squealed.
“My Lord!” Legge spluttered.
“Do you see it was not from inability I forwent your maidenhead,” I assured her.
“He took mine and no danger,” my maid simpered.
“Sir are you quite mad?” Mellors enquired.
“Not quite lad,” I assured him, “Now bring your wench and let us discuss matters like gentlemen do in a whore house.”
“Wench, how dare you call me wench!” Lavinia bridled.
“Give over Miss,” the maid said quite rudely, “I likes his lordship fucking while we discusses stuff. You will too if you gives it a chance.”
We went into my snug, I sat on my chair while my maid straddled me with my member inside her.
Mellors sat in the other chair with his breeches down. “For heaven’s sake Lavinia you know you want to,” I chided.
“Oh very well,” she agreed and she sank down on Mellor’s member until when fully sheathed her lips brushed his. Their tongues entwined noisily, “Do you love me?” she asked between kisses.
“Yes, I have loved you from the first time I saw you,” he admitted, “I own I am the happiest man in the world.”
I shook my head, “Oh well my dear, little chance of any sensible discussion,” I advised, “Lets leave these two to their pleasure and away to my bed.”
“Do you love me?” my Maid asked quietly later as she climbed off me.
“I love fucking you,” I admitted.
“I love you fucking me too,” she said, “That’s sort of being in love is it not?”