I rose up from the couch like a zombie from its grave, grabbing Mother’s gift along the way. My erection was so hard I was surprised it didn’t hurt. It led me into the hall, down all the way to the end. I knocked.
“Craig?”
“Yes, Mom.”
“Come in.”
The first thing she said when I closed the door behind me was, “There’ll be no talking. Do you understand?”
I stood passionless in expression, burning with lust on the inside. Mother was sitting on the end of her and Dad’s bed. She was naked, and my dick jerked with need. Sitting exaggerated her soft curve, breasts nearly touching her sweet little bulge of belly fat. Her belly resting on the very top of her thighs, made thick by resting across the comforter, half concealed the dark, hairy mound of her sex. I swallowed a large glob of saliva, placed the jar gently on her dresser, and began removing my clothes.
Her hands dithered, sometimes smoothing the bedspread, sometimes drumming her fingers on her soft flesh. Twin, pink flushes filled her cheeks as she tried not to look like she was eager for the sight of her son’s giant pecker.
That sight was eager to see her. My boner heaved out of my boxers as I slid them down my legs. It flounced forward, trying to drag me to the lusting woman who had given me life. I stumbled towards her, feet not quite free of my pants. Thank the gods I wasn’t wearing shoes!
Mom turned her head away, perhaps to hide a smirk, but her face returned with the same seriousness it had greeted me with. Yet at my approach, she scooted back on the bed and turned over to stand on her hands and knees, presenting only her rear.
Mother’s thick pubic thatch nearly hid the glistening line of her outer labia, but the tight pucker of her anus drew more of my attention. I realized my mistake then and doubled back to grab the plastic jar of lubrication.
“Mom, you can’t just say nothing. This jar tells me most of what you want, and I’m smart enough to realize you don’t want to say why or even acknowledge what I’m about to do. But you need to help me with how!”
I opened the jar and ripped off the joke of a ‘protective seal.’ As if some right-winger was going to poison a jar of petroleum jelly- Er, except those who morally objected to anal sex. I folded the slick side of the seal together and tossed it respectfully into a small bin beside Mom’s dresser.
Finally my mother spoke. Her word were gentle but halting. “I-I just assumed you – you knew what to do.”
“Maybe if I was gay. My two girlfriends might have had enough chutzpah for pussy sex with a normal size…” My voice trailed off, and I dipped two fingers into the slimy goo and dug out maybe a tablespoon’s worth. I was pretty lucky to have had two decent girlfriends during high school. A lot of guys had none.
“You mean, you’re a virgin?”
“Technically no.” I climbed onto the bed, with my knees, and waddled up behind my mother’s broad ass. It twitched in anticipation.
Mom’s voice intensified. “Stop right there. If in any way your sister was involved, I don’t want to hear-“
“No, Mom.” My last girlfriend had let me put it in her and fuck her slowly, but it was too big. It hadn’t hurt her, but the pressure in her vagina was too uncomfortable. She was a petite young woman. I respected her reaction and thanked her for trying. As a consolation prize, she brought me off with her hands and mouth, but it wasn’t most people would call a blowjob. I’m not sure why we broke up. A few weeks later we kept getting angry with each other.
Thinking about it left a little anger in me. “How do I apply this stuff?” My grease globbed fingers hovered near Mom’s dark and rather large pucker. It looked larger than mine, and I poop logs thicker than my erected dick! “I heard you have to use a lot.”
“More than a lot, Craig.” My mother warned. “Use at least a quarter of that jar.”
“That didn’t answer my question.” I was feeling testy. My teen rebellion superpower wasn’t happy that I had to let my mother take charge of the situation. She acted the complete opposite of Nell’s anxious submission that morning.
“For fuck’s sake!” She swore but abruptly giggled. “Literally. Sorry, Honey. I’ll guide you.”
Mom spoke efficiently, saying only what was required for my to prepare her for a thing I still couldn’t believe was happening. I should have considered my father’s right to her fidelity. Although I was confident, she had rare lovers outside of their marriage with his permission if not explicit. She no doubt allowed him similar recourse, but I did doubt Dad would have done it. I was his son whom he trusted and loved. I loved him, but the tiny devil hovering over my right shoulder, pounded my tiny angel into a bloody pulp.
At her direction, I used the first glob of smelly lube to coat my dick. I had to dip twice to ensure it was sufficiently greased. Then I pressed a smaller glob upon the crinkle of my mother’s anus. I rubbed that pert eye for nearly a minute, adding extra lube every few seconds. She told me at one point to push more firmly, with a fresh swipe of lube.
Mom gasped when my middle finger slipped into her butthole. Her body shuddered. My limited experience with female orgasms told me that I had made my mother shake from a little quake in her loins. I looked, expecting to see her masturbating, but her hands remained on the bedspread. “Don’t dally, Craig. Push more in until you can slide three fingers in and out.” She was breathing fast and shallow.
I speed up pressing Vaseline into my mother’s ass. I had probably used a third of the jar when she moaned. “I can’t wait any longer, I need to feel it!”
You and I know she meant my dick, but I was never more proud of the major salami jutting from my crotch than at that moment. I didn’t bother with words. I quickly grabbed and aimed my dick, hunching forward until the grease coated tip met her shining sphincter.
“Just a second.” She did something. I only noticed the back of her thighs clench. “Push slowly but firmly, Craig. I’m going to resist, but you keep pushing.”
For a high school senior, I don’t consider myself very strong, but I put my best effort into forcing my dick against my mother’s shitter. Something about forcing her, inspired me to try as hard as I could.
The head mashed uncomfortably against her shield on maximum. The muscles working against me peeked out of her thigh’s soft layer of fat. For a couple seconds, I saw my mom’s thighs of steel. Suddenly, their sharp definition darted back into hiding. Mom’s asshole relaxed completely, and my cock sank into her rear as if sucked in! Her body jolted forward from the energy imparted to her butt.
“AAAA!!” Mom’s groan sounded like exquisite pain.
For all our advantages: copious lubrication, mom’s large anus, and my best effort to defile it, only the first third of my dick disappeared up my mother’s slick colon. The next third slowed considerably while entering, as if her insides had to adjust for its thickness and length. She’d stopped resisting, but her colon had never experienced such a cram packing.
“UUNNNGGHHH!!” She growled. I grunted half as passionately, continuing to force myself into a hiney that was tighter than its entrance suggested.
“The lube didn’t go deep enough, Craig. You need to work more in with your cock!”
“I’m almost there, Mom!” I argued, only two inches remained to stuff into her.
“No, Honey. It hurts!” She claimed.
“A little hurt will make it better.” I was past following her instructions. If she had sounded more hurt, I would have relented. I didn’t doubt that my prick was considerably uncomfortable, pressing so far up her ass, but until she acted as if she was actually harmed, I refused to give up. I wanted this too badly, perhaps as badly as she still wanted it.
“Craig, please, don’t do this all at once.” She tried to crawl forward, to ease the pressure forcing such a fat diameter into the least experienced depths of her poop chute.
“Just a little more, Mom.” I had sank another half inch into the breach. “You’re doing great!” I coaxed.
“Nnnggghhhh!!” She whined, but she did not tell me to stop.
“Rrrrhhh!!” I growled, hunching bit by bit further. I had to grab her hips to prevent her from escaping.
“Ow.” Her butt flinched. I started to feel guilty, but there was only an inch remaining to drill!
“Ooohhh!” The exclamation wasn’t a happy one.
I tried slowing down, but then I wasn’t making any progress, and she was starting to be in genuine distress. “I’m sorry, Mom!” I blurted and bucked as hard as I could, pulling her ass to me at the same time. Gods, she was tight!
“YEOWWW!!” She shrieked. If we hadn’t been alone, I probably would have found myself arrested, the cops having been called by my sister or father, the latter having heard her from miles away in his noisy workplace.
The last, greased inch of my prick slammed up her ass! I gripped Mom’s hips while she groaned and convulsed. “DAMN you!” She howled at me, half as loud as her shriek.
“It’s done, Mom. I’ll be still and give you a rest.”
“That was really stupid, Craig. What if you tore my insides?” She winced from speaking.
“I thought we weren’t supposed to be talking. Except to help me get inside of you.”
Mother growled, her ass too uncomfortable to use her diaphragm to talk. She turned her head to the bed’s headboard and took quick shallow breaths as if fighting the pain of childbirth.
I needed time to recover too. She hadn’t been the only one in distress. Her deep tissues had wiped away the copious lube from the head of my dick. The last shove grated the sensitive underside. I nearly howled with her.
We remained cock-ass tied like two gay dogs until she her breathing slowed. I had caught my breath. “I’m going to use more lube.” I began pulling out. That wasn’t nearly as uncomfortable as forcing myself in. She took deeper breaths, and I was suddenly trying not to explode cum up my mother’s dirt road! As the discomfort and pain subsided, I found myself in the most erotic, nasty situation ever. My sister would have had to have been six years old for this morning’s mouth attack to be half as nasty as drilling eight and three quarters inches up my mother’s ass.
“Gods, Mom, this feels incredible!”
“Shut up!” She barked. I looked past her left should and saw her face scrunched up. Not in pain, I think she was concentrating on the sensation of a truly big prick withdrawing from her ass. My probe felt a shudder deep in her loins. Another little quake had lurched along her pussy’s fault lines. I couldn’t believe orgasms could be triggered so simply.
When just the tip of my cock remained in her butt, I scooped up more jelly and stroked it over my cock. Motes of poo dotted my prick. My stomach got queasy, but nothing would prevent me from pushing more lube between the pliable prick head and her anus. I stuffed at least another tablespoon of goo at the front of my intruding prong, without pulling out entirely.
Then I grabbed Mom’s hips again and gradually re-sank my full prick up her rear end. She filled that span of time with full hearted groans and moans. I added a few myself to the music in the room, as I pressed deeper and deeper along her much slicker anal passage. Before I bottomed out for a second time, Mom’s body jerked from yet another, slightly better orgasm. I was so jealous. I had to do math problem in my head to prevent flooding her anus with cum!
Sticking to a slow pace, I began fucking my mother’s incredibly tight and hot ass.
“Awwhh, yes, fuck it, Craig. Fuck my ass.” Mom blabbered as if she’d lost control of her brain’s speech center.
I was struck speechless, except for astonished honks, as I gently rode nearly eight inches of fat cock to the brink of pulling out of my mother’s butthole with each backstroke. My brain asked, Why, WHY? What had happened to make this powerful woman offer her ass to the nasty, greedy son she had born into the world? My brain asked but had no functional cells which could deduce a reason.
Meanwhile, Mom’s little orgasms occurred more frequently, and they were getting stronger. My rutting prick made a terrific, flesh buried seismometer. “Oh sheesh, Mom, what am I doing to you?” It seemed impossible for a person to shudder with delight so often!
“Don’t stop, Honey! It’s incredible!” She goaded me. Her hands clenched and clawed at the bedspread.
I didn’t need goading! I needed to take a break to prevent my willpower from shattering from the rising tide of my arousal. Gritting my teeth I stared at the pillow my father used each night beside my mother, possibly after each time he had made love to her. Not shame, but guilt culled the erotic forces conspiring to climax in the next few seconds. I held on to reason. I clenched Mom’s hips and increased speed. My hug dick looked like it was being swallowed and vomited by a fat faced lamprey. Its tight, greased throat sucked and disgorged most of my prick, in and out, again and again.
At some point, I would have to face my father and future tussles with his wife. I had entered Mother’s room considering the shame that he might endure but I allowed my lust to think instead of my heart. That wicked part of me was finally seeing fruit on the tree of my scheme to take complete advantage of my mother’s and sister’s fetish. What eighteen year old could resist when the star of my loins and the foibles of their desires were so seductively aligned? It may not have been fate, but I was too inexperienced to do them and my father any better.
“Ohhhhh, Fuck, it’s filling me like a watermelon!” Every sixth of Mother’s grunts and moans were accented by another tiny orgasm. I had begun counting, to stay my own climax. Our humping and recoiling bodies shook the bed wildly! Her tits wagged loosely, nipples nearly scraping the bed cover. I wanted to grab them and squeeze them and suck their sensitive knobs so dark and rubbery. But my cock demanded more from me.
I became a timepiece, fucking in and out of my mother’s dirt hole to tick every second away. Ten, nine, eight,…
“Harder, Honey. I can take it- ULP! … I think.”
Her breathy words and grinding hips wound up my piece until it broke into double time! My crotch pounded her ass! The lube between us thinned from our friction. Pain along my plunging staff grew hotter. “I’m FUCKING YOU, MOM!” I roared!
“Ow-ow-ow – OWW!!” She too was aching from her slowly drying anus!
…five, four, three-
“Slam it- OWWW, slam it, Baby! RRGGHHH!!!” Her suffering roared back at me. “Almost-“
Zero.
“AWWHHH-GODS-DAMN-FUCK-MOOOOMMMM!!!!” I howled, plunging deepest into her sore depths.
“TERRRIEEEE!!!” Mother screamed my father’s name!
Cannonballs would have flown slower than my projectiles of thick cum. My epididymus rapid fired half a dozen fertile rounds into my mother’s excretory passage, dooming all of them to horrid death. A creamy torrent tried to follow up that first barrage when Mom’s anus abruptly clamped down around my thick intruder, shutting my urethra down tight!
Like a bear trap around my third leg, Mother’s orgasmic thrashes shook me nearly off of my knees! I held on to her wide, soft hips with all my might as her ass tried to bite off my aching prick! “OWW, MOOM!! OWW!!!”
“UNBELIEVABLE!” She rambled like Tourette’s victim! “FUCKING INCREDIBLE!” While her ass bit my embedded shaft and convulsed! “GODS DAMN IT BIG!!! UNNGGHH!!!”
Her body’s shudders slowed. “Big big cock. HHHHGGHHHH!!!” She blasted a held breath. Aftershocks came and went as her anus finally relaxed around my prick whereupon a gallon of dammed up sperm blasted into her nasty recess.
“OH, YOUR CUM!!” Mom exploded into nonsensical exposition, again. “HOT! SO HOT!” A final, strong climax planted her face into the bedspread. She bit down, muffling further inanities. Sharp grunts followed each of my final spurts of cum.
We slumped down, trying to catch our breaths. My dick was too big to simply plop out of her sore anus. Half it’s length slipped out. The front half continued plugging the last four inches of her colon.
I was dizzy, blinking stars out of my eyes. The room had darkened. I swear I heard my mother’s rapid heartbeat. Actually, my prick felt its pounding not so far from the soft tip.
“Moomma-” I huffed and puffed. “Can we talk – now?”
“No.” She panted. “I should think not.”
I ignored her. “That was insane.”
“Shhh, or I’ll start crying.” She warned.
“You won’t tell me why?”
“Shut up.” Her voice remained weak. “Get out. Go.” She begged, between breaths.
Like a good little boy, who had been soundly punished by his mommy, I pulled away. Four fat inches of prick meat dragged out of her ass. I winced but clawed my way to the edge of the bed. There I nearly fell off. One leg catching the floor before the other disembarked. My naked butt sank to the carpet, but I quickly staggered to my feet and stumbled out of my parents’ bedroom. The sound of Mother weeping was so soft I wished I had imagined it.
In the hall bathroom, I cleaned myself. As I crossed the hall to my bedroom, I heard water running in their bathroom. “Fuck.” I stared at their shut door. Left my damn clothes behind. I returned to the hall bath and showered. Then I donned fresh duds in my room.
A loud knock preceded the door opening several inches, and a wad of clothes flew through the gap. “I’ll be in the kitchen.” Mom more than hinted.
I gave her a minute before exiting my room and meeting her there. She was dicing carrots.
“Can I help?”
“You did plenty already.” She sounded incomprehensibly grateful.
“Were you crying?”
“Yes. But that’s my business.”
“Yeah, right.” I stood beside the dining table. “Don’t shut me out.” I stood up for myself. “I may not be crying, but I’m so confused, I should be in tears.”
She set down the knife and a two inch, deep orange remnant. Mom set her eyes on me, tried but failed to speak, shifted on her feet, and then said, “I’ll be able to discuss the matter, later. Just know, now, that neither of us deserve any shame or blame.
“But Dad-“
Anger flared in her voice. “That’s all for now!” Her lips trembled.
Before I could defy her decree, the front door opened. “Hey, y-all, Baby Girl needs some hugs.” Nell ambled into the kitchen, hauling a book/computer bag slung across her shoulders.
“Shitty day or period?” Mom surprised me by sounding normal.
“Which will give me the most hugs?” Big Sis sounded almost depressed. I went to her, and we embraced.
She clung to me, jaw on my shoulder. “I don’t hate you.” She whispered.
Mother entered the tangle. “What’s wrong?”
“I just felt out of whack all day.” She confessed. “In a very dark way.”
“Bad blues?”
“Yeah.”
I heard my sister’s sincerity, yet I first thought of myself. “Had I thrown her vibes out of whack this morning? How could that be? All I did was enter her room, wearing a towel. It was clear what I wanted, but I would have respected a refusal. Instead, she had dropped to her knees in the blink of an eyes and attacked the towel like a greedy slut.”
Our hug tightened. Mom gave sympathetic grunts while Nell began snuffling. “Thanks.” I stupidly patted her back, but she didn’t judge it lame. Even blue, Sis wouldn’t let go of an opportunity to put me in my place. Then I remembered asking if the morning’s blowjob had been consensual. She had shaken her head.
What the fuck was happening in my imagined, home harem? If only I could have gone to Father for advice.
To my horror, I began laughing! “Gods no!” I chortled, trying to halt my idiotic response. I pulled away. “Sorry. Seriously I don’t know why I’m laughing!” I begged. I knew. I had, little more than an hour ago, cheated on my father with his wife, via my mother’s ass.
Two pairs of eyes glared at me. “Nell, blame me. Hit me. I’m really sorry you had a rough day.” My throat kept chuckling. “Gods, slit my throat, please!”
Mom turned her head to the knife she had been dicing with.
“You’re fucking weird, Craig.” Nell backed out of our mom’s arms. She blinked. “Sheesh, Little Bro, now I’m angry instead of feeling sorry for myself.”
“Dear?” Mom was confused.
“He snapped me out of it.” Nell explained and stomped up to me. POW! She punched me in the chest! “Fuck you.” It was the happiest sound she’d made since arriving.
“This whole family is psychotic.” Mom was shaking her head.
The three of us pitched in to prepare dinner. None of our various conflicts were forgotten, just put on hold. Empty stomachs can do that when they work together.
Dad texted. He was starting his virtual weekend early and asked us to delay dinner by an hour an a half.
Mom grinned, but I swear a tear formed in each of her eyes.
Nell cheered up quite a bit. I was the one suddenly shouldering a thick burden of self-loathing.
We spent the extra time turning a meal into a feast!
Dad entered six arms of hugging as he shuffled through the door. “Damn, what have you done with my wife and children? I promise not to tell anyone.” His sturdy frame and broad arms returned our welcome. “Pod people for the win!”
We feasted, yet conversation remained light. Work, weather, neighborhood gossip, school, and politics danced from lips to lips as we ate roasted pork, mashed potatoes, sautéed sliced squash and carrots, stir fried garlic noodles, homemade cream of mushroom soup, baked fish sticks, and tater tots with plenty of corn syrup free ketchup! There was no theme to our dinner, except for enthusiasm.
I joined in the banter as pleasantly as the others, yet something was missing. By no means are my family deep thinkers. We regularly gossiped and made lame jokes. I surreptitiously studied my father during the meal. He appeared somewhat confused, not at all his normal participation in a dinner’s discussion. He too sensed something was off.
Mom and Sis were as convivial as they were shallow. The missing piece struck me, when I forked the two inches of carrot that mother had forgotten to dice. I stared at the emasculated, sautéed root. Nobody was talking about sex!
I looked up, shocked. Before anyone noticed, I ducked my head down and stuffed the carrot into my gob. Our family may not be the raunchiest of storytellers, but any meal without one gut wrenching innuendo, was not a meal at our family table.
I spoke through half chewed food. “Dad, aren’t you going to miss out on fucking your secretary for the next two days?” I don’t think he had a secretary, and whatever office assistant performed those duties for him was probably a guy.
Mom and Sis paused their forks and spoons.
Dad heaved a breath inward. At last, someone had broken the evening’s virginity! “I invited her for a three-way tonight, after we put you children to bed, but she said she didn’t have the courage nor stamina to compete with your mother.”
Mom burst into laughter, a little too convincingly.
“That’s just lame, Craig. Daddy never cheats on Mommy, except with me.” Nell sounded more authentic.
“How’s the pork?” Mom blurted. “Not too bloody? It went in the oven, partially frozen.”
“Pork’s fine, Mom.” Nell caught on the possibility that there was something to catch onto. Her eyebrows knitted.
“Good.” She rose judiciously from her chair. “I’ll check on the pie in the oven. You all keep talking.”
Nell turned her inquiring gaze at me. It asked, what’s going on, Bro?
“What, Sis?” I play acted, my teeth still sawing the carrot. “Do you suspect Dad and I are getting it on behind your back?”
“Some say bisexuality is the ultimate form of love.” Dad carved into his bleeding cut of pork.
“Fine.” Nell abruptly pouted. “You can fuck Craig’s butt all you want, Daddy, but you can only make love to me and Mommy!”
“PIE’S READY!” Mom shouted as if we couldn’t hear her from fifteen feet away. I detected more than a little nervousness. “Do you hyaenas have any room in your bellies?”
“Sure!” I gulped down the carrot. It hit the mass of food queued up to my stomach. I figured I owed Mom some support.
“Rhubarb!?” Dad’s eyes lit up upon sniffing the air. “Start making another one, Hon. I’ll just be a minute purging into the toilet. Don’t you dare slice it up. I’m not sharing tonight.”
Nell wasn’t mollified, yet she didn’t want to rock our leaking lifeboat. “I guess I can have a small slice.”
The three of us still at the table, went into action. We carried our plates and the larger dishes to cover the countertops. I grabbed forks. Dad got out the pie server. Nell pulled out dessert plates. We returned to the table and reforged its purpose. Mom follow us, pie steaming in her oven mitts.
For half a second we were a Norman Rockwell painting on the cover of The Saturday Evening Post. No shit. I used to jack off to the ones that showed a mother and a son in the picture – another example of how fucked up I was.
Mother kept quiet as Dad cut and served slices. Nell elbowed my ribs but seemed more concerned about Dad. I did my best to keep the bullshit flowing. “You know, Dad, I’m a virgin down there. Be gentle with me.”
I think that was going to far for the most jocular of fathers. Still he accepted the remark in the silly context it was offered. “You mother’s the one who trained mine.”
“Stop it, you two!” Mom stood up and slammed her fists on the table!
“Mom?” Sis and I recoiled.
Dad acted. “Honey, what can I do? What’s wrong?”
Mom took a deep breath to calm herself. “Give me a minute, and I’ll tell you, Terrance.”
“I’ll strangle the children if you need peace.” Dad wasn’t sincere but was totally there for his wife.
Mom choked on a laugh. “You-” She ducked her head to hide a smile. “Sorry. This is serious, but I think they need to hear it too.” She rambled, “I wanted to collect my thoughts better before discussing this, Terrance, but I can’t repress these feelings any longer. None of you are at fault. It’s just that tonight’s conversation kept gnawing at my heart.”
“I’m listening.” Dad implied, on possible pain of death, that Nell and I would listen too, or else.
“I’m a fool, My Love.”
Dad was silent.
“You and I have had our bit of stray fun, in the past.” Mom studied her children. “By that I mean, your father and I occasionally have sex outside of our marriage.”
There was no way in all the hells, would Nell nor I divulge that we’d guessed their secret a couple years ago. Except, Nell figured our old man had enjoyed a few times in an unfamiliar sack. I was wrong thinking he was too loyal to Mom. Corrected, I felt a strange kind of awkwardness.
“I really wanted more time to decide how to say this, Husband.” She only called him that when she was about to give awful news. “And maybe I’ll change my mind. Either way, you deserve to know.”
“It won’t change my love for you.” Dad’s tone intimated to his children that we better fucking accept whatever our mother was about to divulge.
“I’m sure it won’t. It’s not anything worse than all we’ve overcome since we fell in love.” She decidedly revealed, “I’m going to start having regular hook-ups with another man.” She bit each word of that last sentence. “Never ask who. I swear my love for you will never languish, and I will be as eager to bed you as always, if not more eager. You talk to me, now, Terrance.”
Dad needed a minute too. He didn’t single me out but scrutinized Nell and I. He was making sure that we weren’t going to fly into hysterics. I suspect Nell was too shocked to go nuts. Not about mom’s announcement of infidelity. Nell couldn’t have cared less about that. What shocked her, probably, was that her mother was actually confessing right in front of her. Nell’s perspective of their battle-hardened respect for each other, while arguing about everything, couldn’t handle that much forthrightness.
“The result is not in the saying, Carona. It’s in the doing.” Dad told her.
“I’ll do my best.” Mom stood crying. “I’ll make mistakes.”
“Love is for freeing people, not binding them.”
Okay, that’s a bit corny, even for my old man. I’m sure that was the best he could come up with, having to struggle with serious, internal emotions while openly supporting his soul mate.
“Fuck off.” Mom sniffled.
“No.” Dad refused. “I’m going to eat pie, and then I’m going to take you into our room and eat more.”
“Daddy! Your turning my ears red!” Nell had nothing. We ignored her.
I was speechless.