When I was 10 I went to spend a summer in Oklahoma with my dad’s family. Dad and I spent our first few days with his mom in OKC then on the fourth of July we went up to Tulsa to my Aunt Denise’s where I was to spend the rest of my summer.
I had been excited for many weeks prior to arriving in Oklahoma. I was an only child and my cousin Matt, at the time 14, was going to be spending a month with me an Aunt Denise’s. He was not her son, but I’ll go more into that later. I was 10 and had never had any expirence with anything sexual. As any child is, I was curious, but never had much oppertunity other than the typical childhood “I’ll show you mine, if you show me yours” games. This would all change in the coming weeks.
When Dad and I first arrived in Tulsa it was just Aunt Denise and a few other people cooking dinner. Her “daughter” Aimee had a 4 year old son and my 4 year old consin was there and they wanted to go swimming. My being from a cooler region of the country was definately into swimming. Not long after I got in the pool….Matthew showed up…he had been at work with my uncle….He came up and gave me a hug…I hadn’t seen this boy since I was 4…and wow had he grown up…He was tall for 14…anout 5’6″….very slender…toned abs….blonde hair and very blue eyes. Very attractive…even knowing he was my cousin…I noticed this right away…
Everything went on normal until my dad left on June 8th….That night everyone was outside smoking pot and my cousin and I were inside….obviously too young to be around such things…We were in his room…watching wrestling…all of the sudden I felt a tingle between my theighs…I looked down to see my cousin slipping his hand in my shorts…
I asked him what he was doing…He simply replied “Just lay back…it feels really good…” I began to get nervous and I closed my legs. I didn’t like what he was doing…it didnt feel right….I had never been touched down there…ever…and to have my cousin do it…It felt weird. Plus it hurt a little. Eventually he pulled my legs apart and put his finger in. he slowly thrusted in and out. I was recieving no pleasure at all…I had NEVER had anything inside me before…and frankly I didn’t even know another hole existed down there…I just knew it hurt. I asked him “Can you move up a little?” He became slightly hostile: “Where do you want me to go?” Apperently he didn’t know what the clit was.
Eventually he stopped, grabbed my hand, and placed it on his extremely erect cock. I had only seen one penis before in my life and it was my fathers, only when he was soft and getting in and out of the showers.
This felt like a warm hard something with a skin that skid over it very quickly when pumped. Each time I pumped I felt him move more and breathe harder. I learned very quickly that this was what I was supossed to do. Pump his cock furiously with my very young and inexpirenced hands. Eventually there was a knock on the door and a considerable amout of panic as he quickly thrust his cock away and i sat up. It was time for me to head to bed, but this would not be the end of Matthew’s molestation of me.
The next night Aunt Denise was watching anew episode of “Sex and the City” and told us to stay in our rooms. Matthew instisted I stay in his. Eventually he found an extramely erotic movie…I have yet to find said movie….though I have looked for years…but it was about a business who took sexual advantage of a woman throughout many scenes. I knew when he put this movie on what he was expecting…so I just got the idea of trying to please him…perhaps if i pleased him…it wouldnt be painful or scary…So my foot gently began caressing his already erect cock.
“ooooohhhhhh Gooooddd, You’ve done this before haven’t you?” He flattered me with words…so I would get more into it….eventually he was inside my little cunt again…this time…along with the pleasure…I felt a sense of satisfaction. This was the first time a man had ever touched me…and he was my cousin. He was sexy…and he wanted me….As much as I knew this was wrong…and a big part of me hated it and feared him….I was beginning to enjoy it..
as the days and weeks went on…Matthew devloped games. He turned innocent childhood games into sick ways of getting into my pants. We played “tag,” in which everyimte you were tagged you had to take your pants down and run around…Honestly…I was ashamed to take my pants off…but seeing his hard cock…which was quite large for a 14 year olds. Quite skinny…maybe 1″ in diameter…but quite long at 7″….with an odd shaped head…at 10…never having ever seen a cock aside from my fathers…got slightly excited. “Doctor” was also popular. but Matthew only removed my, and only allowed me to remove his galbladder, which he claimed was far closer to the genitals than it is actually located.
One night we almost got caught…He had been fingering me…then for some reason we started to rock. Back and forth on the bed. No touching. just rocking and laughing. My uncle came in and said “dude, She is your cousin” and matt replied “GROSS Dude, Shes my cousin. I’d never do that…” That night he told me “You know, you’re young enough where having sex wouldnt matter…” I had to leave the room right then. I never answered him. I just left for the night. The molestation continuted every night for the 5 weeks I stayed there. Soon I flew home and was left alone.
The day after I returned home I found myself thinking about Matt…thinking about his finger inside me…and how good it had felt everytime he touched me…and so I told my mom I needed a nap and made my first attempt at masterbation. I slowly slid my finger inside my tiny cunt. I noticed immediately that it didn’t have nearly the same feeling or mental effect. I sat there and fingered myself for about 15 minutes before i got bored. Because Matthew had never drivin me to orgasm I didnt even know that they exsisted, as he had never come in front or around me.
Once I hit eleven I had reached her heights of self pleasuring. when my dad would go out to the gym i would double lock the door, find the thickest marker i had, sit spread eagle of my apartment floor and shove it in and out of my pussy like crazy. I even got so far as to begin to talk nasty to myself “Oh God yes, fuck that pussy, shove that pen in and out of me….ohhhhhhh fuuuuck yeahhhh” Though penetration never made me cum….I soon learned how to stimulate my clit.
One day Dad went out to the store…and i decided to take a shower. I noticed while I was washing my pussy what I was very horny…I finished washing my tight little cunt then pulled apart my little lips and learned back to wash the soap out. There was one particular section of my dad’s shower head that 4 streams ran together…this spot hit my clit with unbelieveable force and sent a jolt up my spine. It felt AMAZING. I soon layed completely down on the floor ot the shower and spread my legs far and wide. the water hit my clit and I began to expirence my first orgasm. My entire body tensed up and it felt like a wave and pleasure crashing over my entire body. my legs and pevis began spasming and i had to close my legs, but the pleasure was still there. I sat there in the rushing water, just lying there, 11 years old, basking in the afterglow of my first orgasm…I wanted more.
Matthew came to visit us the next summer. I was nervous when he came. For weeks before we had talked on the phone, never a word of anything that had occured the past summer of course, so I relaxed. But when I saw him get off that airplane…a fear began boiling in me..though a small part of me enjoied what had occured…I knew it was wrong and having him here scared me a little….but I was also slightly excited.
The first day was over and it was time to get to bed….I had a bunk bed with a futon on bottom and always slept on bottom. I top Matt her got top bunk and refused. I told him I couldnt sleep up there…I just never slept well. and he said “Well I guess we’ll have to share.” So at first I put a wall of blankets between us, said “Good night” and rolled over facing away from him….soon enough he piped up, “Do you wanna play a game?” “What game?” “It’s called chicken” he said, “how do you play?” I asked. “Well, you see, you do whatever you can to the other person to try to freak them out…and the first person to chicken out loses.” “I’m not sure…” Suddenly, his eyes caught fire…and I knew bette rthan to refuse…”Alright….you start.” I said in fear. He began to reach for my panties. He pulled them down and wiggled his fingers inside. It had been a long time since I had had someone other than myself inside me…and I enjoied it. I squirmed and pretnended to be freaked out…but his two minutes ran up and it was my turn.
I slowly crept below the blanket. I was going to try something I never had before. I was going to taste cock. I pulled my cousin’s boxers down to expose his huge cock. it had grown quite a bit from the past summer. I ran my hand up and down it a few times….just to prepare him….then I slowly leaned down and licked the head of his swollen cock. It tasted salty….he already had buckets of precum leaking out. I placed my whole mouth around the tip of his cock and began moving my head up and down as i sucked, still stroking the remainder of his cock with my little hand.
The rest of the summer went on like this. He went home and I spent the next year masturbating….again.
I still used the shower at my dads…but I had found that a more direct water flow was quicker and began spreading my legs to my moms showers water spigot as well. I began shoving sharpies up my cunt at different times of the day. forcing myself to keep them in for hours at a time. only when my stomach began to cramp up were they allowed to be removed.
The next summer I went back to Oklahoma. This would be the last time I ever saw Matt. When my dad left, again on July 8th…The rape began….
We were watching American Pie 2 on Matthew’s bed. “Do you remember that game we played last year?” “Which game?” I sheepishly asked, knowing it was starting all over again. This time I was older, and knew my cousin touching me was wrong. I was determined that this was not going to happen again.
“You know….chicken…”
I sighed….”Yes, I remember?”
“Well, who won?”
“You did, Matt.”
“No, I don’t think we ever finished…”
“Well, you win, okay?”
“No, I dont. We’re going to finish playing.”
“I’m gonna go to bed…I’m tired.” I began to get up and head for the door.
Matt hand firecely grabbed my arm
“We’re going to finish this.”
His eyes were red again, so I did as I was told.
He spread my legs…and put his fingers in.
Deep, it hurt.
He finger fucked me for a long time.
After a while he got bored.
“You’re turn”
I refused silently to suck him off. I jerked his cock for two minutes until it was his turn again…
This time his head disappeared below the blanket and something warm soft and squishy began touching my pussy. I soon realized it was his tounge and began to squirm. This was too far for me. He began to sense I was going to give him the win, so he moved quickly. Before I knew it i felt a huge hard lump at the entrence of my virgin hole. I began squirming hard “No, please, Matt, No…” but before I could stop him he was inside me. All I could feel was my insides burning. It felt as if he had set his cock aflame as he ripped away my virgin cherry. I squealed and twisted. He pounded me furiously until i began to feel a warm oozing liquid shoot deep inside me, It was then I feared becoming pregnant by my cousin.
He quietly rolled off of me and told me to go to bed.
The next day he started a fight with my aunt and I didnt see him for a long time after that.
Soon after i returned home i shared my fear of pregnancy with my mom.
She called the cops and Matt went to jail for 6 months.
Not nearly long enough…but he was only 14-16 during the crimes.
Havent seen or heard from him sense….
But I know he has a daughter…and I can only imagine the sexual torture that little girl endures.