Something electric happens along highway 17 towards Santa Cruz. At a certain point the need for speed gives way to a slow coasting along the swerve of the roads. The trees tower over, and your eyes can’t help but take in the scenery. The trees sway along the hills, the forestry drowns in abundance, and the air is crisp and pungent. Another swerve and the entire scene hits you again. Soon enough from the hills and forestry and the air crisp and pungent, the natural world becomes all that you know. And that’s when the electricity emerges, a sort of prickling deep within, awakening yourself from eons ago, telling you that you’ve finally come home.
But this electricity is fragile and fleeting. And soon enough there are blinking red lights and green signs in Clearview font and cars in caravan, and that old friend goes into hibernation as the city hums with a fluorescent hue.
As I approached the city of Santa Cruz in the middle of a clear April day, I carried some of that residual electricity with me. I was excited to be on a little vacation and leave my day-to-day behind. And of course, I was excited to visit Julia.
It had been almost seven months since we’d seen each other in person. A lot can happen in seven months. I’ve been told that the key to a successful long distance relationship is a commitment to daily communication. In that respect, we had succeeded. We were on the phone every day and zoomed at least once per week, despite my job, and despite her classes and traveling for tennis. But it still stinks. That feeling after those zoom sessions sinks your soul and makes you ache. It’s especially hard when what you have together isn’t exactly defined as a relationship.
Thinking back to my own experiences, I remembered what it was like at her age, especially those first couple years. You’re supposed to step beyond the life you previously knew. Experience new things. Experience new people. Have some serious fun and never get too serious, except for your classes. I wanted all of this for Julia, and at times felt guilty that I was tying her down because of our attachment to each other. I carried these concerns within as I found a guest parking lot in the heart of the campus.
UC Santa Cruz, where the world is your oyster and smells like it too. There were banana slugs all around but not the type you’d find in the woods. The day was beautiful and the ocean breeze complimented the heat. I wore a loose white button-down, untucked, with flip-flops and sunglasses. Even though I was a bit older than these banana slugs, I was gifted with some of those good anti-aging genes. Combine that with my tattoos and I blended in just fine on campus.
But I showed my cards soon enough, getting lost in search of Julia’s dorm. I ate crow and approached a couple guys, one of whom was carrying a watermelon.
“Let me guess. There’s vodka in there,” I said.
“Bruh. We’re about to carve it,” said the guy with the watermelon. “Step 1.”
“Tradition, baby,” I said. “Hey can you guys guide me towards Biko House? I’m lost.”
Watermelon’s friend got me on the right track. He wore a hawaiian shirt that would have been seen as tasteful if he was on the islands. The boys were energetic and fun and the hills were lush with green grass. Thinking about those young men and their stupid adventures got me thinking some more about Julia. I imagined that Julia ran into plenty of boys like the watermelon bros, as well as a spectrum of others who were just as fun and untethered, boys who were sweet and kind, boys who were insightful and deep and interesting, and of course boys who were just flat-out fuckable in the minds of many others. We weren’t exactly in a relationship, and truthfully I didn’t think we could be yet, even if we wanted it. So in my mind, if she hooked up with anyone these last seven months, I wanted to be ok with it. I intended to be ok with it. And I didn’t want to limit her experiences. Yet, Julia seemed fully invested in me, and seemed fully dedicated to school and tennis all the while.
The hills zig-zagged and overlapped and converged at an apex, where Biko House stood upon. Its outward appearance was dominated by brick, and had an aesthetic fitting to the 1970s. When I climbed some concrete stairs and approached, a small group of students happened to be exiting the dorm and held it for me and I was inside. I worked my way up to the 3rd floor. The hallway was a perspective piece of cream-colored walls and off-blue carpet. There was muted music and whiffs of weed and a girl in a towel, who scurried to her room and closed the door. Dorm life. Even with the nostalgia I was feeling, the place still made me feel a bit old.
As I walked along the hallway and watched the numbers go down, I felt especially weirded out over the fact that I was that guy now, the older guy with the younger girl. I didn’t feel comfortable in that role. I knew the way guys could often be, predatory and single-minded, and on the surface I felt like Julia and myself’s dynamic had that sort of appearance. On the other hand, I knew what we had went far beyond those depths. And it wouldn’t seem so odd if it was a fifty-something dating a forty-something, for example. These insecurities, however present, were easily overshadowed by what I knew stood beyond the door of room 324. There are exceptions to every rule. And she was exceptional. I exhaled all my doubts and gave the door a knock.
There was an audible gasp on the other side of the door, right before it flung open to the cacophony of Julia screaming and bouncing and grabbing my body, now bouncing together and more screaming, into my ear and down the hallway. I got lost in the chaos that I didn’t even think to lift my arms around her. But she settled down and we finally hugged. Out of the corner of my eye I saw a guy with sunglasses who looked like he was in a 1990s Mountain Dew commercial pop his head into the hallway then back inside.
“Bruh, it’s the professor!” he said to someone inside.
Julia let go of me and yelled down the hallway, “What did I say?”
The guy popped out again and lifted his sunglasses. “Julia that’s him? Man, he doesn’t look like a professor. He just looks like, a dude.” His roommate popped his head out and it was like a buddy comedy with gophers.
“You’re an idiot, Josh,” said Julia.
“Thank you,” said Josh. And Josh said “nice to meet you” as he and his roommate faded back into his room and the door closed.
“Professor?” I asked.
“Don’t worry about it,” she said. She smiled and put a hand on her hitched hip.
It hit me instantly. Julia looked different. She had lost a little weight and looked fitter. Generally the super thin super fit type isn’t my thing; I prefer a girl with a little more to squeeze, so to speak. But in this case Julia really looked great at her level of fitness. She wore a beautiful canary yellow summer dress that had roses on it, which hugged her breasts in a very classy and sexy way. It was tied at the waist with a cute brown bow.
“Wow,” I said. “Can you give me a little twirl?”
Julia blushed and I spun her around a couple times. Thank goodness, I realized, that she somehow maintained that juicy booty of hers, despite her weight loss. Her bubbly butt popped out against the silky fabric of her dress. My mind suddenly wandered, thinking about what her ass might be tasting like…
“You look so damn good,” I said. “All that tennis…”
She lifted a leg like she was doing a Captain Morgan. “Give it a squeeze.”
I did and it was rock hard. I gulped a bit and wondered if she noticed. Julia invited me inside and closed the door behind.
Zoom is a funny thing. If you’ve ever been in a situation where you’ve zoomed with a stranger, then actually met them in person, you realize it’s just different. There’s something about being face-to-face with another human being that is the truest test of your sense of reality. So even though Julia and I had been “seeing” each other for many months, only now could I see a difference within her beyond the physical, in the way she carried herself. Some months ago, Julia was the follower. She was innocent and moved with an awkwardness. Now when she looked at me, she wasn’t star struck. She was present. She looked at me like she didn’t need me to guide her. Being on the same wavelength made me attracted to her even more.
Her room, however, was exactly what I expected. She had piles of clothes in different places, and bottles of personal care products wherever there was space. Her wall had a pride flag and pictures of her family and a couple kpop posters. Her roommate’s wall was covered in astronomy posters and there were piles of books all over. It was a sunny afternoon but the blinds were almost closed, and the room was lit by lamps of soft reds and warm yellows. I sat on her bed as Julia reached into her mini fridge and grabbed a couple bottles of Miller High Life. She popped them on the edge of an Ikea table that seemed to be more bottle opener than table. She sat next to me and we tapped our beers.
Julia put her hand to my face and rubbed my beard. “You’re growing this out?”
“Yeah. I never stuck with it before. It got weird at a certain length. But it’s going places now that it’s past that.”
Julia chuckled. “It’s going places…” She took a sip, swallowed, and stared at me hard. My heart fluttered.
Someone was playing music next door and Julia didn’t bat an eye.
My fingers played itsy bitsy spider on her legs above her canary dress. For a college dorm with so many sounds it was interesting how silent it felt. I didn’t need to look up at her to know she was looking at me.
“So…,” I said, still looking down, “you packed for tomorrow?”
“Nope,” she said, with a popping noise on the p.
“I left my stuff in the car.”
Julia twirled the hair above my ear. “Might wanna take care of that, dude,” she said. “Campus gets some break-ins at night.”
“Oh. Should I?–”
“–not now,” she whispered. “You got time. We…got time.”
Suddenly I was reminded of the trees on the highway.
Julia took a large swig of her beer and put it on the floor. I followed suit. She put her arms over my shoulders and got very close.
“You smell nice,” she said. Her breathing was warm. “I missed you.”
I put my hand on her thigh. “I’ve been aching, not having you around,” I said. “It’s been hard.”
“Well, here I am dude.”
I was breathing heavier now. The air felt warm between us. The silence hung in that air like a water droplet, fully engorged, on the precipice of falling into its right place.
We leaned into each other and kissed, and the familiarity pummeled me like tsunami waves. It was beyond the muscle memory of our previous times together. It harkened to what was, is, and will be, for eternity. And the trees swayed along the hills and the air was crisp and pungent.
Julia nibbled on my lower lip and let out an mmmmm that channeled into my body. Her cheeks were soft and I gave her hips a squeeze. We parted our embrace. I exhaled like I was blowing out a candle across the room. Julia giggled her giggle and we hugged, which felt just as nice as the kiss. She fanned herself.
“Dude,” she said. “Dude.”
I thought to say something but instead I kissed her again. This time we opened our mouths and our tongues began to take control. It was cute and lustful. My recognition of that lust made the blood rush down below and our hands started exploring our bodies. One of the yellow lights in the room flickered for a moment.
“I think I have to change,” she said.
“Really? That dress looks great on you,” I said.
Her horizon of green irises stared into me and she said, “Not my dress.”
“Oh?” I licked my lips.
She put her arms back onto my shoulders and got close. “I’m a little too wet.”
“Ohhh? You are?”
“Yeah,” she whispered.
My heartbeat increased. “Stick out your tongue,” I said.
Julia looked at me like she was playfully reluctant. But she stared at me unblinking and seductive, and went ahhh when she presented her tongue. I curled my lips around it and sucked on it all over. The moment I finished Julia said, “Now, you.” And she did the same to me, tasting it.
“I’m so wet,” she whispered. We fluttered our tongues together.
I broke from our flutter. “Let me eat it.”
“Oh god,” she said.
I squeezed her breasts while kissing her. “Let me eat it.”
The doorknob rattled then burst open and a singular mass of backpacks, arms bags, books, loose rolled posters, and a poster tube flew in, all being carried by a five foot being whose leg kicked backwards and slammed the door shut in a single fluid motion. I took my hand off Julia’s breast while we both watched the mass shed its bags and books and posters to the floor. A young woman, now emerging from the clutter, turned away from us, was tying her hair and exhaling.
“I swear, Jules, this field feels toxic sometimes. It’s like, ok, they want us to go to these conferences to ignite our passions, to explore the unknown! To break the surly bonds and go where no one has gone before–orr-orr-orr. Of course, then, they use some Carl Sagan quote to pump us up. But then you go to these conferences Jules and–”
She turned around.
“Oh my!” said the girl. She fiddled with her nails. “How…umm, hello! I’m Emily.” She gave me a firm and aggressive handshake that I kept feeling after she let go.
“Uh,” Emily said. “Oh! Oh this is Friday, right! Today’s that day, and…here you are! Yes, yes, I got it now. I got it now!”
“Girl,” said Julia. “Why so much stuff? Also, why didn’t you put the posters in the poster tube?”
“Nice to meet you, by the way,” I said.
“Yes, yes. Nice to meet you too, sir. I mean, young man!” said Emily.
“Oh my god Emily,” said Julia.
“Strapping young lad,” said Emily, in a pretend dad voice. She put a leg up on a chair and kept going with the bit. “You know, sonny, back in my day–”
“Em!” said Julia.
Emily was short and stocky and looked like she hadn’t stood still in a decade. She had curly brown hair, highlighted blonde, and sharp red-rimmed glasses. She was wearing a black t-shirt of HAL from 2001: A Space Odyssey.
Emily adjusted her glasses. “Jules, wow! Look at you, putting it together. Rawr, sister. Meoww. Hissssss.”
“This is my roommate,” said Julia, dropping her hands and her head.
Emily scuttled to the bed and jumped on with us. “Aww, I’m just kidding!” She hugged Julia tight and pressed her cheek against her face. “I love you more than Carl.”
“I believe that you’re kidding,” said Julia. “I don’t believe the Carl thing.”
“My husband,” said Emily to me, flitting her eyelashes to the sky. “In another life, I suppose I could have been Mrs. Sagan.”
“Anyway,” said Julia.
“Yes, anyway. The conferences,” said Emily.
“No, the posters!” said Julia.
“Ah, but madame, therein lies the rub. For you see, the posters…drum roll please….are for, the conference!!”
“What conference?”
“Lpsc in Houston. I fly out tonight!”
Julia arched an eyebrow. “But what about–”
“I know, babe, I’m so sorry! The opportunity came up and I had to take it,” said Emily. She turned to me. “You see, young man, Jules and I were going to take you out tonight to experience the fiiiinest cuisine Santa Cruz has to offer…foie gras and caaaaviar and sea urrrrchin and all the delectables, I mean, delecto-bows, a sophisticated man like yourself deserves. Nom nom nom.”
Julia turned to me, smiling. “I know she seems like she’s absolutely insane. But I promise you, she is.” I laughed pretty hard.
Emily gave Julia a kiss on the forehead and began packing with urgency. “Alex is bringing me to the airport. 30 minutes!”
“Ohh! He’s such a sweetheart to you,” said Julia.
Emily dropped the shtick for a moment and I saw upon her face an old soul, caring and kind. “Yeah. Uh. He is.” Emily laugh-snorted.
“You should, to use your line, jazz it up a bit,” said Julia. “Can I help you?”
“Oh, I don’t knowww,” said Emily.
Julia turned to me with a smile stuck on her face. “Your stuff?”
I told her I understood and would be back soon.
It was a bit hotter now but the breeze was stronger. I made some mental bread crumbs from Biko House to the car. My bags were warm and there was chocolate inside. Walking back, knowing where I was going, I felt a little more comfortable on campus, and reflected fondly upon my days as a freshman. I also was shifting between walking fast and slowly strolling. A part of me wanted to take my time so the ladies could do their thing. Another part of me was in-tune with a new reality. Julia and I had the room to ourselves. I wondered if we would pick up where we left off. I wondered if she wanted to take the next step, or wait for Monterey. I wondered what it would be like as her wet pussy gripped my cock, her powerful athletic body dominating me…
A smoker outside Biko was kind enough to let me in. Upon entry to 324, Emily was packed and wearing a clean red blazer over a black top decorated with silver ferns. No glasses. She looked very cute, and I told her the same, which she didn’t believe.
“No, like, honestly. You look really good,” I insisted. “You shouldn’t hide your eyes, they’re really nice.”
Emily blushed. Then her phone rang, which led into a flurry of bag stacking and shuffling feet and rattling poster tubes. Julia and Emily hugged, and Emily offered me another sturdy handshake. She went to the door and turned around.
“I’d tell you,” said Emily, “that you two love birds don’t do anything I wouldn’t do. But…Jules has other plans! Huzzah!”
“Em!” yelled Julia.
Emily playfully stuck out her tongue and ran out the door with her stuff and the door slammed as we heard shuffling down the hallway.
Julia looked at me with puppy dog eyes. “Dude, that was really sweet of you to say that to her. She deserves more of that.”
“Of course,” I said. “Her eyes are pretty.”
“All those guys in the science department don’t know how to talk to a girl, you know? Make her feel special.”
I walked up to Julia and put my hands on her hips, her arms to my shoulders. “It’s probably not so easy for them,” I said. “Honestly it’s not so easy for me, either. Except, ya know, with you.”
“Oh my god, stop it,” she said. “See what I mean?”
We kissed and it was soft and sweet. It all came rushing back in an instant, as Julia undulated her lower body into mine while we continued to kiss. The realization that we hadn’t lost it, and had simply pressed play again, was such a thrilling feeling. She was acting uninhibited, and groaning while we locked lips. Perhaps that’s why I felt in the moment to push things a little bit.
“Tongue,” I commanded. Julia obliged. I held her head in both hands as I sucked it.
“Good girl,” I said. I pushed her to the bed so she was flat on her stomach, her backside facing me. Her ass was so curvy and bulged beautifully from that soft silky yellow dress. I unzipped my pants and let my own bulge emerge, still under the boxers.
“Stay there,” I said.
I got on top and pushed my bulge into her backside, finding the peak of her curvature and sinking my junk into it. I was poking my bulge directly into where her asshole was, underneath that dress, giving her a huge wedgie, and getting me rock-fucking-hard.
“Mmm,” she said. “You like doing that to meee?” She giggled. The sight of her dress being swallowed by her ass crack was so great.
Julia got off the bed and we started making out again. She took my hand and guided it under her dress, into her panties, and under, to an absolute soaking region between her pussy lips that was hotter than the outside air.
“See?” she said.
“Mmm. Can I have that snack now?”
Julia dove to the bed and scooted against the wall. She moved with urgency. Her forehead was crinkled with horny concern and her mouth was slightly open. Still urgent now, she reached under her dress and hooked her thumbs onto her panties, saying “This?” as she hurried them off, coffee colored and wet. She was quick with her breaths as she lifted her feet onto the bed, knees up. Saying once again, “This?” as she pulled her pretty dress up, exposing a gorgeous sight of her pussy, glistening, and the air was pungent.
“This is what you want to eat?” she asked.
I dove in between her legs without hesitation. She smelled musky and a little tangy and her pussy was all over my face. In that moment, I acted selfishly, driven by my lust and my knowledge that she wanted me down there. I was eating her up like her moisture was the only oasis in a thousand mile desert, lapping her clit, nibbling on her labia, tonguing the wetness in between, fervently and addictively and with no consideration to what she was wanting in that moment. It all tasted too good to me. I just had to eat it. I just had to suck it and taste away, like I was a young teenager who had no control, fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck on loop.
Luckily Julia gave no indication she wasn’t happy. She gasped and swerved her pussy into my face. She grabbed my hair and forced my head directly onto her clit, using me as her oral sex toy.
“Unhhhhh. You like it?” she asked.
I nodded while I kept busy.
“Just like you remember?” she asked. “God I missed that tongue.”
It was like a sauna in between her legs as I swirled patterns onto her clit. Her stomach muscles were flexing. My head was buried in her and my bottom half was dangling off the bed. I was so damn horny that I used a hand to undo my belt and slide my pants off, now just in my boxers, and I was dry humping the side of her mattress as I kept munching away at her robustly earthy pussy.
I reached a hand below and started jerking myself over my boxers. I got up and she was surprised to see me without pants on. I looked at her as I jerked my cock over the boxers, quick little hand motions, and I held the boxer cloth tightly over my cock, holding it at the base. My horniness was pulsing and trying to burst out. And as I moaned unhhhhhh we both watched as the tip of my dick pushed forward and a droplet of clear liquid seeped through the fabric and was now visible on the outside.
“Dude that is so fucking hot,” she said. “That is so. hot!”
“Ohhhh look what you do to me,” I said. Julia had that sad but not sad sad horny expression on her face again as she was slapping her clit. I touched the droplet on my boxers and the string of precum stretched long off my finger. At that moment the obvious hit us. She was getting off. I was getting off. It felt like the moment to do it to each other. A silence hung over us. Julia exhaled.
She stood up with intent and undid her brown bow. She rolled her dress off her shoulders, her breasts bouncing out. She bit her lower lip and moaned under her breath. The dress slipped down to her waist, slinked along and down her curvy hips, and dropped to the floor.
“I need it,” she said. She stood and swirled her hand around her clit while looking at me.
I felt like a teenager again. I rushed off my boxers and my shirt, everything on the floor now. Much of our activity was unspoken but our urgency was there, and the tension of the inevitable escalated.
Julia stood in front of me and looked around like she didn’t quite know what to do. It was like the Julia I knew from months ago, and it was very cute.
“Hey,” I said. I hopped on the bed. “Come here, silly.”
She skipped over to me and the mattress popped up when she jumped on. She was now on her back, fully extended on the bed. I sat beside her as we kissed, and I reached over and pulled her legs apart. She started breathing faster, her eyes wider. The aromas of her arousal were strong and so sexy. My cock was rock-hard. I got up and moved my body in between those spread legs, into a space super warm and pungent. I told her I was excited.
We both looked down at the sight of her legs spread apart, her gorgeous pussy, and my thick erection right there, precum on my tip, pointing towards that inviting pussy.
“Go slow,” she said. “Oh my god, go slow. This is happening. This is happening.”
Her skin was beautiful light brown, mine pale white. I lined the tip of my cock up to her opening, breathing so damn hard. Beyond the precipice. I looked at her, she gave me a nod, and I looked back down and slowly pushed forward, watching my cock head sink in and disappear.
Her breaths were stuttered. “Ohh-hh.”
“Oh my god,” I said.
I held her hands and she squeezed back a bit when I pushed forward some more. My shaft slid in. It was incredibly warm. It wasn’t tight, but it felt impossibly good.
Julia was doing little rapid breaths as she took it. And she started waving her hands to her face, tearing up, breathing hard, looking up at the ceiling. She reminded me in that moment of an ex, who was hyper-sensitive and would get overwhelmed with emotions during sex.
“Are you ok?” I asked. “Does it hurt?”
“No. No, just a little,” she said. “It’s just…” She fanned her face and exhaled, tears rolling down her face now. I hadn’t moved in any further nor out. I held her hand.
“Are you sure you’re ok?”
“Yes. Yes. Ohh-hh. Everything feels so strong.”
I told her I understood.
“Ohh-hh. It’s ok. Keep going.”
Carefully, I sunk in as deep as I could. It felt perfect and comforting. I groaned ohhhhhhhhhh in total pleasure. My pubic mound was pressed fully against her pelvis, as I massaged her hips. And as I slowly pulled back, rippled rings of pleasure massaged my dick purely. My gasps were choppy and I was fighting to not cum. I was too excited. It was a prickling feeling. I pulled out completely, lined up the tip, and pushed in again slowly. I paid attention to Julia’s facial expressions as I entered her.
“Oh my goddd,” she said. “Oh my gAHDDD!”
The tone in her voice was so different. Her general dead-pan demeanor suddenly turned perky. And I knew that it was because of me. And the fact that I knew that, in that moment, made the feeling of her pussy just too much. I couldn’t take it. I pulled out of her a little quick, which made her gasp and wince a bit. My cock twitched and tingled and I shot two super hot lines of cum all the way from her pubes to her neck. Ooooooooooh Julia giggled cutely.
“Did I do that?” she asked, coyly.
I truly felt like a teenager again. But I laughed and she shared in that with me, which made me feel really happy. “I’m still good. I’m still good,” I said. And I was. I was still completely engorged and rock-hard, like my cumming did nothing to stop my erection. In a funny sort of way it made me proud, both because I was still hard after cumming, and because she was supportive.
“That’s so hot that you can keep goingggg,” she said.
I tapped my hard dick on her pubes and shook off a couple drops of cum, then lined it back up and entered her fully.
“Ohhhh fuuuhuuuck,” she said. “Yesss, my kinggg.”
“Fuck Julia. Fuuuuck.” I pulled out again and tapped my head onto her clit, a little more cum dribbling down.
“It’s so messyyyyy,” she said.
I then entered her again.
“Yessss, keep doing that. Slow,” she said.
We both moaned when I got in fully. Then we watched with curiosity as I pulled out, lined myself up, and slipped all the way back in. More moans. She liked watching it go in and out of her. We were looking at each other too, sometimes, when I’d slide in, watching what the sensation did to our faces, which turned both of us on even more. We were making beautiful music with our moans. It felt so good to be able to express ourselves in such a different way. Any shred of insecurity I previously felt must have been left to roast in the car. I finally went in a little harder and quicker and she went, “OoOh.”
“Is that ok?” I asked.
Julia held her lips tight and gave a hesitant nod. I started thrusting in her firmly, and every single time she made the same sound.
OoOh OoOh OoOh OoOh OoOh OoOh OoOh OoOh
She grabbed onto the headboard and sloped back more comfortably, taking me. “Ohhh shitttt,” she said.
“So good,” I gasped out, as my hips were thrusting.
“Yeah dude, yessss. We’re fuckingggg now.”
Suddenly we were in a rhythm, my cock sliding in and out of her smoothly, her pussy muscles milking me each time. I started grunting and getting more aggressive, but being careful while doing so. She winced now and then, still. We picked up the pace, however, and she started matching my ferocity. I was loving the sensation of pressing my pubic mound against her puffy pussy each time I got fully in her.
“I can take it,” she said. “I can take it. Oh fuck. Oh fuuUHHck!”
“Ughhh milk my cock.”
Julia swiveled her pelvis as I was inside and squeezed her muscles and I could feel her grip. I pushed all the way in, then pressed my pelvis further into her puffiness and went oooooooooh
“You’re filling me! This is sooooo good,” she said. “You like it?”
I reached onto the headboard and starting thrusting into her harder, going uhh with each thrust, my mouth agape while doing so. Her eyes were watering a bit, and she was rubbing her nipples and her hair as she took it. My cock was tingling the entire time. It was almost numb from so much pleasure. But what kept me going was that other sensation, that feeling when your pelvis is getting slammed and it sends ripples from the base of your genitals, upwards. It was driving me forward, propelling my thrusts.
“Ohhh Juliaaa,” I said. “I’m getting closeee.”
“You got moooore???” she said.
“Waittt,” I said. I pulled out of her. My cock was twitching up and down. I held my hands in place and exhaled, trying to hold back the sensation just a bit longer. And this time, I did it. My cock was covered in our fluids and it was still pretty hard, but not like before.
“Can we try one more position?” I asked.
“Of course!” she said. She exhaled. She sat up on the bed and we kissed.
“Maybe, like, I don’t need to say this, but you don’t need to impress me, dude,” she said.
She rubbed my shoulders and hit me with a challenge to my vulnerability I wasn’t expecting. My eyes watered a bit and I felt safe. I curled her messy hair over her ear. We hugged.
She leaned into my ear and whispered, “How do you want me?”
“Remember our game?”
Julia’s face lit up. “Ohhh shit, dude. Yeahh. Let’s gooo!”
I sat on the edge of the bed. Julia got up and walked her bubbly ass around the room a bit, teasing me while I stroked my dick.
“Oh my god,” I said. “After all this time…”
“Mmm,” she said. “You finally get to put it in this way.”
Julia approached me and I spread my legs. She got in between and turned around, her ass facing me. Julia looked over her shoulder, smiling. I reached out and grabbed a big handful of her ass with each hand, jiggling each cheek.
“God, this thing…,” I said.
“My boootayyy,” she said, giggling.
My cock was rising up. “Let me just take a quick little…” And I spread it open and stuffed my face in the middle.
“It ticklessss.”
It was sweaty and full of our creamy friction and a little dirty. And I loved all of it. I pulled back and a single strand of spit hung between my mouth and her ass crack. I wiped my mouth and looked up at Julia.
“Does the airbnb have a shower?” she asked.
“Yeah. Can I just…?” And I spread her ass cheeks open and dove back in. I just had to. I was magnetized to it. Julia started sliding her ass up and down along my mouth.
“You know how to make a girl feel special, dude,” she said.
“I told you,” I said, “I want all of you.”
“Allll…”
I pulled my mouth away and she turned around, dropping to her knees between my legs.
“Let me get you ready, real quick,” she said. She grabbed my cock and brought it close to her face.
“It smells like me!” she said, giggling.
“Mmm you wanna taste your pussy on my cock?” I asked. Julia took it in her mouth and my dick disappeared in an instant. She tapped her hand onto my thigh and I knew what to do.
Glug glug glug glug glug-glug-glug-glug glug.glug.glug.glug. glugluglugluglugluglugluglugluglug
I pulled away and fell back on the bed, holding my cock. “You almost…”
“Sorry!” she said. “I guess I’m, like, really good at that!” Julia laughed very loud.
“You are, my queen,” I said.
Julia let out a slight aww and got up, getting between my legs, her ass now facing me. “Be careful,” she said. “I’m already sore.”
My attention went down to her butt, as she lowered it slowly towards my cock and the last cum that lay within. I pushed her lower back a little forward so her pussy became more accessible. Her pussy lips wrapped around the tip, then swallowed it whole, and her weight slammed into my pelvis and I was fully inside.
My reflexes forced out an ohhh as I felt the feeling, which was so warm and embracing and cozy. It felt like I was being engulfed, like my dick was wrapped in the most velvety blanket ever. Julia exhaled in front of me, and I hoped she was ok. But my mind quickly went to the sensations of being swallowed by Julia. It felt so intimate.
“Oh yeah,” I said. “That’s it, right there.”
Her butt lifted up and then plopped back down, swallowing me again. It was a different feeling from her throat, but I loved it just as much.
“Oh fuck Julia. Use me.” She started bouncing up and down. Her glistening butthole was winking at me as she bounced her pussy on my cock. I could the smell the sex. The air was pungent and I drowned in the abundance of pleasantries. An electricity within emerged as Julia yelped with each plop onto my cock. And my teeth clenched and my cock stiffened, and the inevitable. I grabbed Julia’s hips and took charge, pounding her pussy hard, her jiggly ass flesh rippling each time my pelvis hit into her. I caught a second wind and held the tingling sensation back, and felt a bit relieved that I could keep going and keep feeling her velvet beauty.
And then Julia said, “Fuck, I’m about to cum. Shit shit shit, keep going, don’t stop don’t stop.”
And that sent me into a stupor and the inevitable wasn’t knocking on my doorstep but rather pummeling it with a redwood log. Julia was making a lot of noise. She grabbed her own panties and muffled her sounds into her dirty underwear. I held on for dear life trying to maintain my hardness and not cum as Julia started slamming into my pelvis slowly, her asshole winking a lot, lifting her ass up again and slamming back down, all while yelping into her panties. She threw them to the side and turned over her shoulder.
“Cum with me,” she said.
As Julia melted velvet in my lap, I couldn’t hold back. I grabbed her waist, still inside, and we fell backwards onto the bed and I thrust wildly into her from behind. And I fucked fucked fucked fucked fucked and my cock was erupting. I pulled out and sprayed cum onto her belly, onto the bed, onto the floor, onto wherever it seemed to want to go. It was a total mess and we slumped backwards. We breathed and laughed and stared aimlessly at the ceiling, sinking slowly into the softness of the bed.
Julia took a limp arm and collapsed it onto my belly. “I’m so done, dude. So done.”
“Such a mess,” I said. “Whewwww.”
We crashed onto the bed for some time, completely drained. Julia smiled and turned to me. “That was, like, some really good cardio!” She laughed. “That’s my workout for the day.”
I put a lethargic finger up in the air. “Count it.”
“That hurt a bit! I hope I’ll be ok tomorrow. Did that hurt your dick?”
I laughed and told her it didn’t. Julia looked down at my softening dick and noticed a little cum dribbling out.
“You wanna try it?” she asked.
“Uhh, not really,” I said, laughing.
Julia looked a little annoyed. “Dude you made me taste me a bunch! How ‘bout this. Try this with me, and I’ll do something special for you tomorrow.”
I looked at her. “Like what?”
Julia slapped my chest. “Take the offer, dude. Let’s share this. It’ll be hottt!”
I had to remind myself of a lot of things at that moment, including the fact that sexual expectations are so much easier for us guys than they are for women. But I was also drained, and not really at that level of kinkiness. But there are exceptions to every rule and Julia was exceptional. I gave a reluctant nod. Julia licked some of the cum that had dribbled onto my belly, then took my limpness and sucked out the rest. I flinched because it was an uncomfy feeling after already cumming.
Julia cupped her mouth and we sat up on the bed together.
“Try this with me,” she murmured. “We made this happen together!”
Those words were actually kinda hot, I must admit. It definitely helped. I leaned into her face and we touched lips, and she parted her mouth. It was somewhat thick, somewhat salty, but also mostly neutral and not as bad as I expected. And in the moment I shed my inhibitions as I thought about what we just did, and thought about how willingly she gave herself to me. That made the act a lot easier, and we actually got a little wild making out with my cum between both of us, some of it dribbling down our mouths and onto the bed. Julia moaned a lot and seemed really into it, which in turn got me more into it. And we parted and both swallowed and it was ok. I felt good that I made her happy.
“Hell yeah dude! Did you like it?”
“Honestly that was alright. Your words helped. I thought about how we were sharing something we both put a lot of effort into.”
Julia was bouncing up and down a bit on the bed. “Yes, dude! That’s what I’m talking about. I thought about that before. It’s like, I worked for that. It’s mine, ya know?” She laughed and clapped her hands.
“Happy to do that for you, my queen.”
She kissed me and we made plans for dinner. The sun was setting when she opened the blinds, and the hills looked like golden pillows beneath the heights of Biko House.
Julia and I strolled across campus, occasionally holding hands. She made me feel special. Sometimes we would separate because she got excited to show me something ahead. We ran into a couple of her friends and at first I felt weird but one of them gave me a look that told me that he recognized I made her happy, and then I was ok. Julia was energized by the encounter. She was extra affectionate as we continued our stroll through the campus, and my car had not been broken into.
We walked through a couple blocks that housed some students and locals. Even though it was a residential neighborhood, there was a lot of foliage and trees intertwined within its geometry. One particular street was lined with trees on both sidewalks, forming a tunnel of green leaves that was beautiful and romantic and we kissed under a weeping willow. The city hummed with a fluorescent hue as we reached an intersection of shops and cars and gaggles of people. Julia took me to a Greek restaurant that she spoke fondly of.
By the time we ordered and settled into our outdoor seats, it dawned on me that I had taken her virginity. The fact that I had now become that checkpoint in her life hit me heavy and I began to question things. The fact that I hadn’t thought of that fact until that very moment made me question even more. Julia looked at me with young love. We were so exhausted that we spent most of the dinner saying very little and falling half asleep as we waited for our food. The waiter suspected that we were high and encouraged us to order the baklava towards the end of the meal. We laughed over our exhaustion throughout the evening and looked at each other with such endearment. The food was really tasty but I didn’t feel good inside. We sat across from each other at the table, but I asked Julia if I could sit perpendicular to her because it felt more intimate, and she loved the idea. I asked her how she was feeling.
“I’m so tired, dude. We’re gonna sleep well tonight.” She laughed lightly and looked sleepy, but she asked me how I was feeling.
“I’m ok,” I said, exhaling. “I’m feeling a little lost, to be honest.”
Julia looked like she was about to say something in reaction, but she held her silence, which lingered for what seemed like an eternity.
“I bet I know what’s going on,” she finally said.
There was a tornado of butterflies in my stomach before I asked, “What’s that?”
“You don’t know what we are, as like, a couple.”
I was shocked at her astuteness and before I spoke, she interrupted my body language to say, “You’re a lot easier to read than you think.” She giggled.
“Well,” I said, “what do you think is–”
“Like, I know what you wanna do tomorrow in Monterey…,” she whispered.
I laughed and sipped water that I really didn’t need. Julia reached for my hand. We interlocked fingers.
“We can’t be in an ‘official’ relationship right now. My parents aren’t going to accept my former tutor dating me. Not this soon after, at least.”
I didn’t feel any better. “And so–”
“I want you to be my boyfriend, dude. Don’t you want the same?”
“Yes, I want you to be my boyfriend, too.” Julia spit out her water and laughed so loud half the restaurant could hear us and the waiter was even more convinced of his suspicions.
“Actually, you get right down to it,” I said. “I feel weird about all that, especially with your parents.”
“I need time to work on that,” she said. “On them.”
“A major part of me does,” I said. “But I also don’t want to hold you back. You’re just starting college.”
“I can make my own decisions.”
“Yes, but–”
“What did we talk about with respecting my judgment?” she asked. “And then again when you saw I had Guillermo over?”
“I apologized for that. And you were right. I just feel weird.”
“That’s fine. You can feel weird. It is weird. But, dude, given that, what do you want?”
“I want you.”
“You have me. And we can have everything. But if you can’t commit to us it becomes harder everyday. You say you ache. Well, what are you gonna do about it? What we just did meant a lot.”
The waiter arrived at our table and was preparing the check. The night sky was beautiful and it still felt warm outside. The moths circled the lamps that hung like Christmas ornaments on a nearby tree.
“A lot,” she said, staring at me. I took a moment and the waiter was patient.
“Actually,” I said, “my girlfriend and I, her boyfriend, would like to order the baklava, after all.”
The waiter smiled. “Kinda odd way to clarify that, but you got it.”
“It’s symbolic,” said Julia, wiping a tear away. “You had to be there.”
On our walk back home I stopped at my car and gave Julia a coat to hang over her shoulders. We almost ran into a line of late-night runners who wore headlamps and reflectors all over. A couple girls were sitting on a curb trying to fix one of their broken heels. There was a shortcut to Biko house I was unfamiliar with, but Julia said we could take the long route anyway. I told her I had a good time.
“You know, we do have to be kinda secretive, still,” she said. “Anyone in my parents’ bubble, basically.”
“We’re good at keeping secrets,” I said. She slapped me on the chest. I stopped her in front of a lamppost and looked into her eyes.
“I think I’ve been seeing you sometimes as an idea, like a representation of someone like you. And I’ve been wrong to do that. Because you are you. And you’re here. And you, specifically, care for me, and you’ve shown that to me. So I need to see you, as you, all the time.”
“Yes, you do. Yes.”
“And I want to see you as you. I’m really sorry I’ve struggled with this.”
“This is good, dude. Give me this communication and we’ll be ok. This is important to me.”
We kissed under the light. There was resonance and amplification. The lamppost hummed with an electricity that was there long ago, but the city was asleep, its fluorescent hue dormant.
Biko House was alive on a Friday night, the fervor of activity providing a soundtrack to our arrival. A dance party broke out on the 2nd floor, and we tossed back a couple vodka cranberries while we played. I noticed that many who knew Julia were surprised to see her let loose. Most were welcoming and I got the impression some of them saw me as a reason for her inhibitions. One student looked upset as we danced, and I could tell that he had a crush on her. During a lull I chatted him up. He stumbled through his words, trying to express to me his feelings for her. But I fully understood and was real with him and he seemed to be ok.
We were full and tired and a little tossed when we got back to 324. Julia tossed her keys and purse and coat onto Emily’s bed. We were too everything for anything else to happen that night. Julia and I cuddled under her blanket and I was the little spoon. I always ran warm and Julia was thrilled that was the case. I had never felt more fearless in my life and the moonlight shone through the blinds.
Waking up to the sight of your partner next to you refreshes your soul from a source whose depth has no bounds. I took a shower in the co-ed bathroom and was accosted by Mountain Dew Josh, who picked my brain over decision-making for getting a tattoo. He was actually very nice and added to my long-held perception that his generation brims with kindness. When I got back to Julia’s room she was still in bed and groaning while finding new ways to fold herself into the blankets. I got her up and went to get us coffee and pastries while she got ready.
Carrying a couple bear claws and iced almond mochas, I tapped my foot against the door of 324. Julia answered along with a waft of coconut sunscreen that smelled just as yummy as the pastries. She wore a white tank top that showed off her lean tennis arms and tight stomach, and a pair of jean shorts. Those jean shorts, holy shit, they were fashionably frayed and full blue and perfectly short, not to the point that her ass was hanging out, but instead, hugged at just the right places. Her glorious bubbly butt popped, filling the fabric fully, her ass crack just beginning to eat up those jeans, in a classy yet sexy way. I put down the snacks and felt my bulge start filling up my own pants.
“Oh my god, Julia.”
She turned towards me and her breasts jiggled a bit. “You like it? I knew you would!”
I motioned a finger for her to turn around and show me from behind.
“Em calls these ‘the exorcist shorts’!”
I chuckled. “I get it, because of the head turning…”
“No!” she said. “She says it’s because when you see them you start vomiting pea soup everywhere!” Julia burst out laughing.
“That is SO dumb,” I said, losing it for a second. “That is fucking hilarious.”
“Very much her, too,” she said.
I wiped a couple tears. “I’d very much like to know Emily more. Maybe we can all hang together soon.”
Julia put down her coffee and gave me a peck on the cheek. “I’d LOVE that, dude.”
I smiled.
“Also don’t fall in love with her. You too seem like you’d get along too well.”
“If you wear these exorcist shorts all the time, that’ll be impossible,” I said. Julia gave me an aww shucks leg twirl.
“Because I’ll be busy vomiting pea soup everywhere, I won’t have time to–”
She punched me in the arm and I rubbed it a bit. I sat in a chair and watched her finish putting on a little makeup. But mostly I was staring at the glory down below. It made me want to rub myself a little bit lower. When we left Biko and headed to the car, Julia ran back to get a few things she forgot, so I carried our bags and met her down in the parking lot.
Fully caffeinated, we left the academic zoo and cruised along highway 1 through the natural one. She wore sunglasses and sipped on coffee flavored water while we abandoned former lives and reawakened ourselves to ones we lived long ago. Her hair danced in the wind and she sucked on a cherry lollipop she got from the Greek restaurant. By the time we hit Moss Landing the scenery hit us with no form of subtlety. It was a dream, the rhythms of the ocean, the sizzling of beach foam, exposed crabs and seaweed, adrift just like ourselves from the worries of the world.
The crawl through Cannery Row was a tease of activity; we were excited to check it out. But our Airbnb took us a few blocks from the beach and into a curvature of houses splattered with the percolation of the ocean. The main house was painted a nautical blue grey and had a large porch and an absolutely massive backyard. There were well-placed cobblestones in the grass that led from our parking spot to our little cottage in that backyard, about 100 feet away from the main house. Our place had a 2ft high brown picket fence surrounding it, and a small vegetable garden at the entrance. Julia commented on its cuteness.
We dropped everything inside and explored. There was way more room than we needed and we were happy. The bathroom was big and the bathtub was the size of a jacuzzi. King-sized mattress in the bedroom. The living room was naturally lit and had many places to sit. Our plan was to grab some beers at Alvarado Street Brewery, maybe Fieldwork, then head down to the aquarium. But my mind was elsewhere. As Julia checked out the conch shells on the mantle beneath the tv, my eyes were staring at her thick, delicious ass, hugging those exorcist shorts to perfection.
Julia noticed what I was noticing. She lowered her heavy eyelids and smirked.
“I knew it. I’ve been feeling that stare all day, dude!”
“Ohh, Julia. Why did you wear those things?”
Julia put her hands on the mantle and did a pose, wiggling her butt a bit. She looked at me over her shoulder and playfully stuck out her tongue. “How much time ’till the brewery?”
“It’s open all day.”
“I meeeean, I can’t go around in public in just my underwear!” she said. “I have to put something onnn!”
I walked up to her from behind and squeezed her cheeks through the shorts. “You are so sexy. You drive me wild.” I started to groove my crotch into her. Julia reached behind her and grasped my neck, grooving her ass back into me.
“God we’re so good at this,” she said. Our dry humps quickly turned into aggressive pounding. Julia’s ass cheeks were slapping into my bulge so loud it sounded like we could have been fucking. If it wasn’t for our clothing we would have been. We were loud and both letting out unhhs with each thrust. She turned around.
“I love how kinky we are,” she said. She stuck out her tongue and we fluttered the tips of our tongues. “…when no one is watching…”
Realizations are sometimes a funny thing. If you watch too many movies or read too many stories, you sometimes get the impression that any sort of realization or climax is a moment-by-moment build-up. The door opens. The characters are frozen. The music crescendos. Their eyes widen, mouths drop. And they stand there, confronting the creature that stares them down. The creature approaches, and the characters stay frozen, until the realization finally hits them, and then they scream and run. Thing is, though, real-world realizations aren’t so cinematic. They often hit you in an instant, all the details together, and the realization itself happens in your head quickly and unannounced. If anything, the drama is those few seconds as you confirm the realization you already had.
So when Julia and I parted tongues, the realization was blatantly apparent to both of us and nothing needed to be said. We were giddy and rushed to the bedroom, leaving a trail of anything we could take off along the way. The bedroom was minimalist but spacious, lots of carpet space beyond the massive bed itself. There were two mirrored closet doors directly across from the bed, just like in Julia’s room back home. Julia’s panties were pink lace and when she peeled them off they clung to her pussy for just a moment.
“Turn on the lights,” I said. “I wanna see.” I opened the blinds and there were palmetto trees that swayed in the wind. I took off my shirt as I looked at the lushness outside, and when I turned, Julia threw her tank top in my face, giggling and leaping naked onto the bed.
The feeling was that of a soap bubble on the brink of popping in the air. In those precious seconds we were swelling with excitement both physically and emotionally, out of body, witnessing the choreography of our vessels as they took over. Julia, now in missionary, myself in between her legs and on top, my hands now on her inner thighs, spreading her flexible being, Julia now looking down at my cock head pointed towards her. The bubble burst when I slid inside and the static tension was interrupted with a mutual ohhhhhhhhh of satisfaction as we were finally back into each other. Finally.
She was warm and inviting. I didn’t want to leave. I got myself all the way in and fell softly onto her, locking lips. We kissed each other like we really, really meant it. I parted from her pillowy mouth and moved to the side, letting my legs take over, now sliding in fully and pulling nearly out, then picking up the pace. Harder now. Faster now. While at first I moaned, it evolved into grunts of aggression. I had stepped aside and the beast within took over, taking my woman. Julia moved her hands from my back to my ass cheeks, grabbing on, encouraging faster entry and I obliged.
“Fuck me, fuck me, fuck me, fuck me, unhh, unhh, unhh, unhh.”
My eyes were rolling and I surely looked like a fool, and when Julia saw what her pussy did to me she smiled then gritted her teeth, taking me even harder and faster, trying to get me into an even more outward stupor. It felt so sloppy down below. I loved it. A tingle at the base of my cock started to intensify, so I gave one last thrust all the way in, slamming into her pelvis, before it ended too soon. I exhaled and fell to the side of Julia, still inside her.
“Wow,” I said. “You’re too much, my queen.”
She kissed my forehead. “I love how you express it. Is it that good?”
Julia faced me with her head on a pillow, my own head on the other pillow facing her. When she said her words, my forehead crinkled with sincerity, my head nodding in approval. I lifted her right leg just a bit so my cock could slide in a bit more easily from our sideways position. I slid in and moaned oooh, biting my lower lip, pulling back out some, then sliding back in and doing it all again. I was looking down at myself entering her, then up to her face, attempting my best in my mindless stupor to show her how fucking good it actually was. She understood, which made everything that much more enjoyable. I pulled out and shook my cock against her clit. And just like other times, the realization that I was cumming hit me before I even processed it, and I shot a line of cum along her belly and said, “Whoops.”
“That’s how good,” I said, amidst my gathering breaths. “Too…too good.”
Julia was tapping my leg with glee. Her eyes were full of life and the palmettos swayed. “Aww, dude, I love how much you cum!” She swirled a finger along the cum on her belly, then looked up at me with daggers and asked, “Got any more?”
I asked her to get on top. While we kissed I tapped my cock against her ass, and stroked my tip against her pussy, awakening my rod for another round. A few minutes passed and I felt the energy from my base rise up and my cock was hard again. Julia used my chest to push off of me and started slowly riding. It was very good but I didn’t enjoy the position as much because my cock couldn’t slide in fully. I had fun with her breasts, however, sucking on her nipples and stuffing my face in between while she slowly rode me up and down. Her scent was musky and sweaty in a cloud of coconut.
“Can you squat over it?” I asked her.
“For sure, dude. Whatcha wanna do?”
Julia put her feet flat on the bed and squatted onto my cock. On either side I grabbed the flesh where her hips met her ass cheeks, and I said, “Hold on.”
I thrust upward and slid into her fully and easily. “Oh yeah,” I said. “That’s it.” And I started thrusting fast into her.
“Ooh, you wanna fuck that pussy, huh?” she said. I reached up to her sides and grabbed on as I picked up the pace, fucking so quick that my junk was slapping loudly into her ass cheeks. “Ok, yeah, fuck, fuck that pussy.”
We both looked down and watched ourselves mash into our naughty parts. I leaned over and looked at the mirror, seeing my cock slap into her rippling ass cheeks as we fucked real good.
“You like to watch, huh?” she said. “Does it look good?”
“So good,” I whispered. The ocean waves crashed onto the beach in a line and receded before crashing again onto the beach in a line.
By the time we cleaned up and the exorcist shorts were back to hugging Julia’s ass, I was empty and Julia was full and we were both hungry. We left the cottage carrying a cloud of coconut scent, free and fearless and relaxed as we walked down to Alvarado Street. Julia spotted an adorable English bulldog with a massive underbite. We petted it while the owner was getting coffee and quiches. I kissed Julia and began to envision the new normal beyond our vacation. It wasn’t clear but I was excited over the possibility of being a presence in her college life. The line for Fieldwork was massive and there was none for Alvarado Street Brewery, which made the decision even easier. We sat on stools perpendicular to each other at the end of a long wooden table inside. Julia went to the bathroom and my mind wandered, worrying about her parents. But everything was pure and true, and I couldn’t control those circumstances.
Julia ordered a raspberry sour which tasted more like dessert than beer. And it was dangerous and so were her eyes. I ordered a hazy ipa and it tasted like pine needles. The brewery was crowded and bright. I discovered that Julia could do a spot-on impression of Kristen Stewart, and we realized that both our right eyes closed a little bit more than our left. We talked about sports and Julia expressed her concerns over a backup plan beyond tennis. After trying a flight of beer samples, we got into a playful argument over ice cream flavors and decided perhaps it was time to head to Cannery Row (and get some ice cream along the way…).
Something electric happens when you meet that special someone. At a certain point the need to be correct or the need to align with the self-narrative you’ve developed gives way to something new. You divert from the road you’ve traveled, and the new path you take causes you to slow down and take in the scenery. Your partner looks at you with wide-eyed hope, and you look at them the same. And even with your conditioning, your baggage, the drama of the world inside you and the chaos of the world beyond, everything seems so clear and you’re drowning in the singularity of their company. And that’s when the electricity emerges, a sort of prickling deep within, awakening yourself from eons ago, telling you that you’ve finally come home.
But this electricity is fragile and fleeting. And soon enough if you don’t stay present and share yourself with that special someone, that prickling goes into hibernation and your conditioning imposes itself once again. I realized this as I looked at Julia, and felt something deep within, something wholly terrifying and exciting all at once, compelling me to do everything in my power to fight for the present moment.
“You ready for the aquarium?” I asked.
Julia leaned into me and whispered, “Yeah…or…that bathtub looked pretty spacious…”
She opened her purse a bit and I saw the glimmer of a sapphire before she clasped it shut and giggled. “What do you think, dude?”
I smiled, looking into the glimmer of her heavy green eyes. “I think that’s a really good idea.”