“What’s your favorite color?” We were out on yet another date when he suddenly asked me this question at dinner. I looked at him, slightly surprised and raised an eyebrow, but answered, nonetheless.
“Pink, definitely.” Kyle laughed at my response. “What’s yours?”
“Pink, definitely.” It was my turn to laugh. I never expected he would be so goofy. Before I knew him, he just seemed quiet and smart and the opposite of Jason and Travis. Now that I’m getting to know him, I’ve realized he’s funny and playful, as well as smart, and quiet, but at the right times, not all the time. Other times, he can be loud and fun.
“Nah, it’s blue. Favorite food?”
“Goldfish. You?”
He laughed again. “Pineapple. But goldfish…really? Why goldfish?”
“What are you talking about? Goldfish are cheesy and delicious.”
He looked thoughtful for a minute, and then nodded. “I’ll give you that one. Favorite thing about me?”
I laughed. That was a good question. We were on one of our very many dates in the last three months. We hadn’t exactly made it official, but neither of us seemed to be interested in other people. And during these dates, I had noticed so many little things about him that I adored. His sense of humor; the way he could make you laugh at any time. The way he was such a gentleman, always opening doors and pulling out chairs for me. The way his soft lips felt against mine when he kissed me. The way he doesn’t pressure me, because I’m not ready to have sex with him.
“Am I allowed to say everything?”
“Nope.”
I chuckled. “Your smile… and laugh. And sense of humor. And the way you kiss me, and hold my hand. Your hugs… even your smell.”
He smiled. “So… everything?”
I laughed and nodded. “I told you. What about you? What’s your favorite thing about me?”
He smiled and took my hand from across the table. “Your ears.”
I rolled my eyes, but laughed. He stood up from the table, keeping my hand in his and I did the same. He led me out of the restaurant and back to his car. He opened the passenger door for me and I started to get into the car, but he stopped me, pulling my body close. I smiled up at him as he gazed into my eyes. I stood up on my tip toes and closed the distance between lips, my eyes fluttering closed as I felt his soft and firm lips pressing against mine.
I felt his lips form a smile against mine, and I couldn’t help smiling back. One of his hands was firmly on my lower back as his other inched its way up my spine, finally finding the back of my neck and settling there, holding my face to his as his lips moved against mine. My fingers were placed gently on either side of his face, pulling him closer to me, as I deepened the kiss.
Despite moments like these, when I wanted to rip all his clothes off of him, Kyle and I hadn’t had sex yet. I don’t know if it was us not really being together, together, or if I just wasn’t ready since Travis. And despite the fact that every time his lips came near mine, I was completely his for the taking, he hadn’t taken advantage of it. He knew I didn’t want to do anything, and respected it. Usually stopping himself and me before we got too hot and heavy.
He did this just now, pulling back and moving his hands back to mine. I pouted slightly and he chuckled. “Don’t pout; you’ll make me feel bad.”
I laughed and kissed his lips once more before getting into the car.
————————————————————————————————————————————————-
About a half hour later, we were back at campus, on our way to my dorm, where Kyle always insisted on walking me to after our dates. My hand was in his big, warm one, leading me, because he knew the way so well.
We got to my door, where he always kissed me goodnight, sweetly and gently. He did it again tonight, the same as always, but tonight I didn’t want him to leave. I always hesitated, not sure whether to invite him in or not, afraid of what would happen if I did, and usually choosing the latter. Tonight I had no hesitation as I opened my door, letting him in.
He seemed surprised, but not in a bad way. He glanced around my room, chuckling as he took in the pink surroundings.
I sat nervously on the edge of my bed as he looked at the pictures hanging on my walls. He eventually turned to me, looking more nervous than I imagined I did, and sat next to me.
I turned to him, suddenly concerned that something was wrong, searching my mind for something, but coming up blank. He was fine a few minutes ago; what could have happened since he came in here that’s upset him?
“Emma, I… I need to ask you something.” I nodded, wanting him to continue. “I want you to know that I really like you. I haven’t looked at another girl the way I look at you in… a long time. You’re the most beautiful, wonderful girl that I have ever met, and I never want to jeopardize what we have.” He took both of my hands in his, but continued. “There is a very real chance that I am about to fall completely in love with you. And I need to know if you feel the same way. Because as much as I like you, I don’t think I can handle having you break my heart.” He looked down at our hands with these last words.
My heart raced as my mind tried to process his words. Did I feel the same way? I knew that I liked him, a lot. I didn’t want to lead him on. But I didn’t know if I was capable of being enough of what he wanted. I didn’t know if I could be good enough for him. When, or even if, we ever had sex, could I satisfy him? Would he be disappointed? I was definitely not a virgin, but the only guy I was ever with was Travis. We’d had sex, but it was never really anything special for me. It was like a chore, and I never really wanted it, let alone enjoyed it. Did I have enough experience to please him? I couldn’t stand the thought of falling short of his expectations. I tried to shake it from my mind and concentrate on whether or not I wanted to be with him.
“Kyle, I… I don’t…” I didn’t know how to continue. I bit my lip. “Are you sure that you want me? Are you sure you wouldn’t prefer one of the hundreds of girls fawning over you? I just don’t feel like I’m… good enough for you. I don’t want you to be disappointed with me.” I met his eyes again, and he looked confused.
“What are you talking about? I don’t think it’s possible that you could disappoint me. Nothing you say or do would ever. Why would you even think that?”
I shrugged, silently.
“Is it about sex? You know that I’m not pressuring you, and I want to wait until you’re ready. I know that your relationship with Travis was weird and he didn’t treat you half as well as you deserve and he didn’t satisfy you the way he should have.” I looked at him, curiously. “He used to talk about you to a lot of people. He said you never enjoyed him, like you should have. He always thought he was so great. But, I want to satisfy you. I want to give you what you deserve, if you’ll let me. I want to give you whatever you want. Please, just let me.” His thumb brushed under my chin, tilting my head up.
“Emma, please.” His eyes were pleading with me, begging me for approval.
I didn’t want anyone else; that was for sure. I thought of his lips against mine earlier tonight. I felt comfortable with him, and safe. I glanced at our intertwined fingers and felt the warmth that his hands brought to me. I remembered his hugs, his laugh, his smile. The sparkle in his eye when he looks at me. I loved seeing it there, and I loved causing it. He said he could fall in love with me. I think I could fall in love with him, too. I was already halfway there.
I took a deep breath and looked back up at him, and was met with is anxious and waiting gaze. “Yes,” It came out as a whisper.
His eyes brightened slightly. “Yes? Yes, what?”
I smiled. “To everything. Yes, I feel the same way. Yes, I want to fall totally and completely in love with you. Yes, I want to be with you. If that’s what you’re asking…”
A big smile grew on his face and he pulled me into him, kissing me again. I let out a relieved breath against his lips and he pulled back, still smiling. I forced myself to smile, to convince him I was okay, when I really wasn’t.
I still wasn’t convinced I was enough. I didn’t want to break his heart, but I didn’t want mine to be broken, either. I was sure that once I gave myself to him, he would realize I’m not this perfect girl he thinks I am.
It didn’t seem to work, though as his smile began to fade from his face.
“Emma, what’s wrong?” I shook my head, trying not to let him see the worry in my face.
“It’s nothing. Don’t worry. I just…I’m really tired.” He wasn’t convinced. He moved a strand of hair out of my eyes, searching my face for a sign of what was wrong.
“Are you sure? You seem really upset. Is it… is it this? Us? Do you not want it?” He seemed to be struggling to get the words out, not wanting to jinx it.
I shook my head quickly. “I do want it. It’s not that, I promise. It’s really nothing; I just need to get some sleep.” I stood up, and he did as well.
I wanted him to leave, I needed to think. I didn’t, however, want him to think it had anything to do with him, so I wrapped my arms around him tightly, and finally felt him do the same.
I pulled back after several minutes, and pulled him to the door, opening it and stepping out. I kissed his lips gently.
“Goodnight, Kyle. I’ll call you tomorrow, okay?”
He nodded, but didn’t look like he wanted to leave me, and started to turn around, walking away from me.
I felt a pang of guilt after I saw the sad look on his face as he backed away from me.
“Wait…Kyle?”
He turned back to me slowly. “Yeah?”
I smiled shyly. “So, uh…does that make me… your girlfriend?”
He smiled and took a few steps towards me, closing the distance between us. “Do you want that?”
I nodded. “I would like that very much.” He smiled and kissed me one more time.
“Goodnight, Emma.” I smiled and turned back to my room once he had left.
I thought about how I felt about Kyle and I as I undressed and got into bed. I knew I liked him a lot and I wanted to try to be with him. I just hoped I could handle being in a relationship again.
I started to imagine what it would be like to really be with Kyle. How his lips would feel against mine while he made love to me. How his hands would feel caressing my body. His naked body pressed against mine, as he thrusts in and out of me.
I started to feel a dampness forming in my panties at these thoughts. I couldn’t help letting my fingers slip under my shirt, sliding up my stomach and tracing around the curves of my C-cup breasts. I circled a fingertip around my nipple and a small moan escaped my lips. My other hand went in the other direction, down over my hips and slipping under the shorts I wore that hugged my heart-shaped ass tightly.
I slowly traced over the lips of my slightly wet pussy as my breathing picked up. I imagined what it would feel like if Kyle were the one making me feel this way. I rubbed my finger in circles at my slit, and then made my way up to my clit, flicking my finger over it. I moaned slightly louder as my finger found the circular pattern on my clit that had pushed me over the edge so many times before, when Travis had failed to please me. He only thought of himself, and his own needs. I had never cum with him.
Kyle could make me cum, I thought as I felt my orgasm nearing. I rubbed a little faster and a little harder, getting closer every second, and moaning louder. He could take care of me in this way.
I pictured Kyle’s lips and tongue moving down over my stomach to my swollen pussy. His tongue would slowly move up my slit, inching closer to my clit, finding the path my finger had just taken.
I rubbed harder, still. I was so close.
Kyle’s tongue would circle and flick over and around my clit. His mouth would finally latch onto my throbbing clit and begin to suck hard.
I moved my other hand down into my pants, sliding my middle finger into the wet folds of my pussy. I let out a deep moan and kept rubbing my clit as I pumped my finger in and out quickly.
Fuck. Oh, god.
I was getting closer every second as I pictured Kyle between my legs, licking and sucking on my pussy. His hands would move to rub my thighs, and his mouth would suck harder.
Yes, Kyle, yes. Don’t stop. Oh, please don’t stop.
My legs began to shake and I bit my lip hard, still rubbing my clit and thrusting my finger deep into me. With a few last thrusts and rubs, I was in ecstasy.
I gasped as the orgasm took over my body, moaning louder than I should have been, not worrying about people next door hearing me.
My legs shook and my mind went blank. I kept rubbing as hard as I could, not caring that the muscles in my hand were tensing up.
I squealed as the last tremors of my orgasm slowed. I let out a slow, deep breath and felt my heart relax. I pulled both hands out of my shorts and settled back into bed.
After the intense orgasm I had just thinking about Kyle and I having sex, one thing was very clear.
I wanted to have sex with him, very soon.
The next morning I woke up feeling much better than I had the night before. Something about my little fantasy about Kyle had really warmed me up to the idea of having sex with him.
So much, in fact, that I was planning on asking him to come over for dinner that night.
I had laid in bed planning the evening for much of that Saturday morning, when finally, a knock on my door roused me out of bed.
I hesitated answering as I was wearing nothing but those tight shorts and a baggy t-shirt from the night before.
I did anyways, and instantly wished I hadn’t, because Kyle was standing in front of me.
He was carrying a large bouquet of pale pink and green roses, my favorite flowers, and a big smile on his face. He didn’t even seem fazed by my strange pajamas.
He stepped into my room, kissing me deeply. “Good morning, my beautiful girlfriend.” He smiled against my lips and put the flowers into my arms. “I like the sound of that.”
I went and rummaged through the kitchen for a vase, still in an early morning daze. That and the fact that I was really confused about Kyle’s showing up here so early. After finding one, I set them on my table.
Kyle snuck up behind me, wrapping his arms around my waist, and earning him a small gasp as he surprised me, and he chuckled.
“I was thinking we could do something tonight,” He whispered in my ear, causing goose bumps to spread over my body.
“I was thinking the same thing. What did you have in mind?” I could feel him shrug his shoulders.
“I’m not quite sure. You have any ideas?”
I smiled and nodded. “As a matter of fact, I do. How about you just meet me here at 7?”
He let go of my waist and turned my body to face him. His lips brushed lightly against mine, and I had to stop myself from changing the plans and just ravishing him right there. I looked up at him and saw the lust in his eyes.
He wants this as bad as I do.
You would think this would make me want to take him right there even more, but it did the opposite. I wanted the night to be perfect.
He kissed me again, firmly, passionately, and yet still so gently. I finally broke the kiss when a list of things I needed to do for the night entered my mind.
I looked back up at him and smiled. “So…7?” He nodded, and was on his way out the door once more. I followed him and leaned against the door as he turned around, a curious expression on his face.
“What do you have planned for tonight, Emma?”
I giggled, and shook my head. “It’s a surprise. All you need to do is show up tonight. Oh, and wear something nice.”
He laughed at the mischievous smile on my face, and kissed me one last time before heading out the door.
He paused as he began to go down the hall, and turned back to me. “You look really sexy in tight shorts and baggy shirts, by the way.” He smiled and was actually leaving this time.
“Don’t be late!” I called after him.