Rape was a part of my psyche from the very beginning.
At an early age, I found a bunch of BDSM mags back in the woods that became the primary focus of my masturbatory fantasies. By high school I was always sneaking in to the local porn store to spend my lawn mowing money on more. I became obsessed with the thought of forcing women to my will.
Like many boys, I took marshal arts classes and worked out with weights, except in my case it was to learn various moves to incapacitate imaginary rape victims and to have strength to force their submission. Even my years in Boy Scouts were spent learning knots with the idea of involuntary restraint. I won a switch-blade knife in a bet with a buddy and started carrying it with me everywhere. Never flashed it around, but had fantasies about cutting the camisole straps on the girl sitting in front of me, and visualized running the tip down her naked neck and back.
When I turned 16, I even started carrying what I called my “rape kit” in my car on the fantasy that I might encounter some helpless hitchhiker some day. The car was an old Buick Regal my parents gave me. I guess they thought it was safe because it was big, but it ad a huge trunk in which I fantasized stuffing my victims. The rape kit consisted of stuff with which to restrain or torture my imaginary victims: some rope, a bit old hunting knife, an riding crop I stole from a nearby horse barn, a box of needles, a canvas tarp, things like that. One of my favorite pieces of kit was a few steel barbecue skewers that I had sharpened to a needle point. I imagined shoving them through the tits of my screaming victims. Finally, I kept an old Polaroid camera that my parents had forgotten about. (I found some old photos that suggested they were swingers of some sort in the past. Kind of weird to see a young version of your mom being pumped in the ass by some guy you don’t know.)
Even when I was in a romantic embrace with my current steady girlfriend, my deep down thoughts were to flip her around, strip her pants and rape her ass doggy style. Generally I would start off with a girl thinking I was romantically interested in her. But since deep down inside I had other motives, our relationships would become increasingly abusive. I probably lost more than one girlfriend because I got a little too rough while petting.
Also, like many at this age I hung-out with some drug-dealing buddies with similar misogynist tendencies. I was not in to drugs myself, but I was known to be generous about sharing my stash with girls who put out. Combined with my reasonably good looks I was able to pop my cherry at an early age because of this. Also with the right pills I thought I might render the the girls more pliable.
I started to first act on my fantasies my second year in high school. A bunch of buddies and I got in to something called we called blousing We would pick out a secluded hallway and wait for a suitable girl to come along. Usually we would pick the mousey or shy ones in their first or second year.
A bunch of us would corral her back in to one of the boy’s restrooms and start to work. Basically, the goal was to get her shirt and bra off while copping as many feels as possible in the process. Generally they would not scream any, just squeal a bit and try to push us away. She would not be going anywhere, since there would be about 3-4 of us.
If we got her tits out quick enough, we would all take turns getting a quick squeeze and suck in. We were not particularly gentle, so I imagine the bitches had a few titty bruises and bite marks the next day. Being that age, we usually had raging hard-on from the very beginning, so we would be dry humping against her body while all this was going on. Maybe pull her hands down to our pants to rub the bulge. Did manage to cum a few times that way. We would also be roughly probing her pussy from the front and back while all this was going on. If she had a skirt and no panty hose on, we we would pull that up and could pull aside the panties enough to finger her directly.
On a few occasions we would get a bitch that had no fight in her and meekly submitted to the abuse. In one such case we had her completely stripped and roughly shoved our fingers up her pussy. There were 3 of us that day, and I think we all 3 came while dry-humping her. I was holding her arms from the back, and came while humping between her ass cheeks.
We also kept a few souvenirs, a bra or some panties to jerk off on while reliving the memories and these are a cherished part of my rape memorabilia even today.
So, yes, I was a sick fuck and the events that happened in the years that followed were inevitable.
[Fun at the Drive-in]
My first real experience happened my senior year. One of my favorite gambits was to take a girl to a drive-in movie with some feature with particularly juicy horror/rape sex like “Last House on the Left”. A cousin of mine worked the admission booth, so I knew I could get myself and a date in to an R-rated movie with no pesky nonsense about being 17 or checking for contraband. After softening her up with a bit of beer, weed or some ‘ludes, I would start making out just before the good parts. I usually picked a first or second year girl, as they were more generally in awe of the senior boys and were less likely to rat on me, as they were not supposed to be there in the first place.
Most would get turned off at that point, and when they did I always enjoyed testing the limits. The girl would first stiffen up a bit as the screaming or sobbing started on the car speaker, or at the first coerced appearance of breasts on the big screen. In many cases this was their first time at a move with a sex scene, let along a rape scene.
I usually had my hands inside my date’s shirt groping her tits or stroking her thighs just before this point, and would intensify my efforts despite her reaction. Depending on how stoned she was, the girl might start to push me away. Rather than stop, I would grab her arm and pin it behind her while pushing her down on the immense back seat of the old Buick. Usually I had the girl drugged/drunk enough that I usually was able to pull up her t-shirt and bra and dry hump her with my raging hard-on before she started to make too much fuss. I didn’t yet have the balls to go too far past this point since, of course, the girl knew who I was. If they seemed like they were going to be a bad sport about it, I bought them off with more drugs.
Finally, though, my generosity the the drugs really paid of. I can remember all the details over 30 years later.
I was hanging out at the mall just after dinner fantasizing about raping the young women in their sexy spring outfits as they made their way back to the car. Although we didn’t know each other, one girl seemed to be eying me, so I asked if she wanted to join me for some weed and a movie at the drive-in.
Her name was Julie and she was quite the spinner. She was in her second year in a high school in the hick part of town and was going to be turning 16 in a few weeks. Just a bit over 5 feet tall, she had long streaked blond hair, and was slim but curvy with small perky tits. She was wearing a sexy white short-sleeve peasant blouse that tended to slide down over one of her shoulders and very short cut-off blue jeans that allowed just the slightest bit of her ass curve to show. The blouse was just slightly transparent in the right light, tied with a string bow just above her tits and I could just see her light blue bra through the fabric. Clearly her outfit indicated she was interested in some sort of action, though perhaps not the sort I had in mind.
As usual, I offered her a few beers when we got to the drive-in. I think she was a bit of an alki as she went through 4-5 cans of Bud during the first feature. In addition I offered her some ‘ludes, two of the big ones with the ‘714 on it. She was getting stoned enough I had to support her when we walked to the restroom at intermission. The second feature was “Lipstick.” I had seen it two times before and I was looking forward to doing my usual about the time Chris Sarandon’s character started slapping around Margaux Hemingway about 15 minutes in to the movie.
During the first feature I already got her into the back seat of the Buick and was feeling her up pretty good. She seemed to be content with the fairly vanilla second-base action we were engaged in. However, the two beers I had downed during the first feature had lowered my inhibitions. As the Lipstick credits started to roll and we resumed our petting, I started to get rougher. Maybe even a bit more that I normally would at this point, as we didn’t really know each other and she was not someone I would have to face at school the next morning.
I pinched her nipples hard through her shirt and bra, and forced my tongue deep into her mouth. I could tell she didn’t like it, as she shook her head “no” and tried to push my hand away. But she was far enough gone from the beer and ‘ludes that “no” came out as inarticulate mush and the push ineffectual and uncoordinated. I think I might have overestimated the ‘lude dose for such a small girl because I doubt she could even walk at this point.
Although we still had about 15 minutes before the rape scene started on the big screen, with beer-induced courage I decided to take better advantage of the situation to start my own scene. We were parked far enough away from adjacent cars that I was not worried about being seen, but I took a break from pawing the semi-conscious little teen bitch long enough to close the windows and lock the doors so no one could hear what followed. With the doors secured and the child safety latches on the back doors engaged the I knew there was no danger of her easily running away. Without really giving it much though I went past the point of no return.
Turning my attention back to my little victim I shoved her roughly down on to the car seat and pinioned her body under mine, straddling her pelvis with my legs. Pinning her arms above her head, I proceeded to force my tongue down her throat while dry humping her through my jeans. She didn’t like this one bit, and started to squeal and thrash around. Although she was not going anywhere due to the weight of my body upon her, I clamped my hand down over her mouth to stifle her cry and reached down to the floor for a rag I kept there for checking the oil. As she inhaled to try again, I stuffed it down her open mouth. The foul, oily rag was pretty big and I as shoved more and more of it down her throat, her mouth was forced open to an obscene “O” and she was only able to emit a stifled moan. Straddling her stomach, I quickly grabbed each of her flailing arms and tied them together at her wrists then anchored them to the door handle above her head.
At this point my cock was as hard as diamond and I knew that dry-humping until I came in my pants was not the order of business on this evening. Where to start? Well, with my trusty knife of course. I pulled it out of my back pocket and made a show of flicking the switchblade open in front of her face. She squirmed as I caressed her cheek with the blade of the knife and started to wail loudly through the gag. I leaned over and whispered in to her ear that I would cut her pretty face to ribbons if she did not stay quiet. At this point she closed her eyes and started a quiet sobbing, tears running down her cheeks. I leaned down and licked them from her face, tasting their saltiness.
I slid the tip of the knife slowly down along her neck, slowly down across her chest, to just below the floral pattern in her blouse that ran across her tits. Slipping the tip in to the fabric, pushed the knife forward and up, ripping the garment as it went until finally the string bow above her breasts parted. The sudden release of pressure caused the knife to jerk, just just barely missing cutting her young face. Gripping the torn opening, I continued to tear the garment downward with my hands until the front of the blouse was completely open, baring her flat stomach and light-blue bra to my unencumbered view.
Not want to rush things, I caressed her belly with the point of the knife, the tickling sensation causing her muscles to twitch and ripple as she sobbed and blubbered some more. We were having an early hot spell and the car, with windows closed, was quite hot and humid. The perspiration had started to form glossy beads on her shoulders and belly, and the sweat from my forehead dripped down to mingle with them.
The obvious thing to do at this point would be to cut open her bra, but I decided I wanted a couple of intact souvenirs of the evening to add to my collection. I reached behind her, unclasped her bra and pulled it and her tattered blouse up around her arms secured above her head, leaving her naked, sweaty back against the vinyl upholstery of the Buick. I began to roughly kneed and twist her now exposed tits, causing her to emit a little yip each time I pinched the skin hard. The tits were firm, firm as can only be found naturally on teen girls.
I traced the point of the knife around each of her areolae, and could see her nipples become erect with fear. As I pinched and twisted them, they became even more erect. I started pricking each engorged nipple with the knife point and the little bitch again started her wailing and squirming. I leaned down and grabbed her hard by her long hair, holding the knife point against her cheek. Pressing the sharp point just hard enough to make a small cut and draw a bit of blood, I again warned her of the dangers of too much noise.
Leaning down further, I took each tit deep within my mouth, repeatedly biting roughly on each nipple. I eventually became worked up enough to bite hard on the surface of her breast with the specific intent to cause her a bit of pain, leaving red welts and eliciting more satisfying yips and squeals. To further dive her terror home, I pulled up one of the nipples and pantomimed cutting it off with the knife. This had the desired effect and her eyes went wide and she tried to screen through the gag as I nicked it slightly with the blade. I hit the little cunt hard across her face several times with my open hand until she quieted down and went back to merely sobbing. A little trickle of blood began flowing from her now swelling lips into the dirty rag stuffing her mouth
Sliding down her pelvis, I straddled her knees and applied my attention to her shorts. They were button fly and using the tip of the knife, I sliced open each button hole in turn. As I reached the last one, I yanked the fly open, exposing the tops of her white bikini panties. Looking back up at the screen I happened to notice that Sarandon’s character was chatting up Margaux in her apartment and that the on-screen fun was soon to begin. Grabbing both her shorts and panties, I jerked them down, exposing her young sparse bush to me, the hair only just beginning to fill in. I slid them down further, underneath me, and leaned back to pull both off past her feet and tossed them to the car floor. I pulled off her sandals and tossed them with the rest. Her fully naked young body lay stretched helpless before me.
Releasing one of legs from beneath me I roughly forced her to spread, leaving one leg dangling off the car seat. Again, I ran the tip of the knife up and down the inside of her thighs, occasionally poking it hard enough to elicit another yip from my little captive. My fingers roughly probed and pinched her inner labia and clit, and she tried to close her legs together to block my access. To discourage this I poked the knife hard against her thighs and kneeled between her legs. As I probed further in to her dry pussy, I could see that my victim for the evening was no virgin, despite her young age. Well, girls from her neighborhood were known to frequently drop out of school due to pregnancy.
Looking out the windshield, Sarandon was becoming increasingly distraught with Ms Hemingway and I prepared to synchronize my next acts with those on the screen. The car was becoming like a steam bath and I first pulled off my t-shirt, then dropped the waist of my jeans and boxers down to my knees. My cock was rock hard and ready, but I did not plunge in immediately. Peeking above the front car seat just enough to see the screen, I held my body on arms and knees just above my little bitch and slid my cock tip up and down her crack, the movement lubricated by my pre-cum, while watching Sarandon slap and rip the clothes from his own bitch.
Finally, I dropped my full body weight on to my little Julie and to the sounds of Margaux screaming “Oh my God, you’re killing me”, slammed my cock deep within her pussy. The little cunt beneath me had a similar reaction to the intrusion. Her eyes went completely wide and she tried to howl loud behind the rag stuffing her mouth. I clapped both hands over her mouth and pinched off her nose, so she wouldn’t have enough air to continue the scream.
In addition to the tightness due to her young age, I had never fucked such a dry pussy before. The sensation from my side was interesting and delightful and I tried to savor it. The resistance to the initial thrust felt at though I was tearing a new hole in her. As I slowly pulled out to start the next stroke, the skin of her vagina clung to my cock as though it did not want to let go. Every 1/4 inch or so it would pop loose, only to cling again in a new position. When my cock was mostly withdrawn, I again slammed it in as hard as I could. Again, her eyes opened wide, her arms strained against the ropes and her legs straightened from the pain I was causing. Although I still had my hands clamped down on her nostrils, she was still able to manage a muted wail. As before I slowly withdrew and jammed her again.
My little bitch seemed to be getting woozy as her reaction to the third stroke was muted, so I let her breathe while I began to pump her more rhythmically. Her breaths were rapid, driven by the lack of air, pain and her panic. She had screwed her eyes shut, but I could see the tears streaming down her face as she sobbed. I again tasted their saltiness as I savored the slippery/sticky feeling between our naked chests. As I continued, I pulled my body back to enjoy the sight of such a young naked body at my mercy, and twisted and pinched her nipples mercilessly as I pumped.
When my orgasm came, it was the most intense I had ever had and the ejaculation seem to go on forever. I collapsed on top of the little cunt, the sounds of sobbing in my ear.
As my dick went limp in her pussy, I began to think about my next steps. She didn’t really know who I was and I doubt she could remember too many details about me in her drug-induced stupor. But I couldn’t really just drop her off back at the mall like nothing had happened, and I certainly was not going to consider anything drastic. No, if I went to prison for this it would be a fair cop. So, “In for a dime, in for a dollar” as they say. The night was still young, so I decided to have a bit more fun with my little captive before I dumped her off on some deserted street somewhere.
The movie was getting boring (as is universal in such movies, the rapist gets shot at the end), so I decided to head elsewhere. Julie seemed to have passed out or something, so I proceeded to flip over her perspiration-soaked naked body. I retied her arms in a straight line behind her back with one loop at the wrists and one at the elbow as I as seen in my bondage mags, then tied her ankles together and looped the end to her wrists, pulling it tight in a bow across her ass. I slid her down to the floor of the car with her ruined clothing and tossed a tarp I had been keeping for my hitchhiker fantasy over her naked form.
As I left the drive-in I began to anticipate with relish the rest of the evening.
To be continued…